Around a year ago I divorced G, my SO of 18 years. Almost a month ago I ran into her mother, with whom I always had a good contact. She stopped and we had a nice enough chat, until she goes "I'm happy you're doing well, but why did you hurt G like that?" At first I thought she meant the divorce as such, but after a short talk I learned that G had been spouting a, let's say somewhat coloured, version of how things happened.

She says, among other things I left without warning. I not only told my ex I felt the relationship was at breaking point probably 100 times in the last year, I was also clear from the moment I made my decision. I also suggested to see a marriage-counselor, which she flat out refused.

Next to that, I'm responsible for her diminished income and 'played' her when she bought our mutually owned house. I gave her a good price (€ 20.000 where I could've easily forced € 50.000) and I agreed on her paying in terms so she didn't need to get a loan. She did, but that wasn't necessary.

And as a last thing, I traumatised our child. Which I've been vigilant about and the kid itself (16M) is clear about me standing up as a father.

That last thing rubbed me the wrong way. I went to great lengths to be there for him, so I told my ex-MIL why I divorced - the hysterical antics, the 'I have to always be right'-attitude, the theft of my dog (long story short, she had my name taken off the adoption papers so I couldn't take him with me), the yelling and screaming every evening...

She left without saying much, but a few hours later I got a voice message from my ex which is mostly screaming and the voices of my ex-MIL and son trying to calm her in the background.

I feel I'm the A here because I couldn't keep my mouth shut and she might take this out on my son. And my ex-MIL didn't deserve such harsh words on her own daughter.