I have a relatively small immediate family. There are 8 adults and 5 little kids/babies. There’s my mom, my stepdad, my sister, my step-brother, my adult son, his fiancé and me.

All of the adult children are expected to give my mother and step-father birthday and Mothers/Father’s Day gifts, as well as Christmas gifts. They in turn, gift us on Christmas and sometimes on our birthdays. I have to remind them when it’s my grandkids birthdays and usually I have to pay for that gift because they can’t afford it (they’re living on meager retirement funds). I find all this gift giving between adults unnecessary and expensive.

Also, my sister is manipulative and earns more money than the rest of us, so she buys them lots of extra gifts throughout the year to be the favorite. In return, my stepfather buys her expensive gifts that he really cannot afford. They are very close and love gifting each other. Mostly, this doesn’t affect me, it’s just annoying.

I’ve tried to convince them to forgo gift giving between adults and just gift the little ones. I’ve also tried to get them to agree to a spending limit, but they will not agree to anything.

I think my mom, step-dad, and sister are the real culprits here. And they think I’m being a Scrooge.

Edited for clarity.