My wife and I went to couple's counseling. When we called to book there was one counselor that had a last minute opening and the rest had long waits. There was a reason for this. If you ever need to book a therapist, don't book the one with immediate availability. Anyway, so we went this morning.

First and foremost, the therapist would not listen to us as we tried to explain why we were there. So much time was wasted because she kept insisting on talking about and asking about topics that weren't what we needed to talk about. My wife and I both repeatedly tried to explain the issue, and the therapist kept saying "the surface issue is rarely the problem; it's the issue underneath that." It took half an hour for us to get her to actually address what occurred.

When she finally listened to us explain what happened she said flat out that I was wrong, my wife was right, I need to apologize for what I said and accept that her dad would always be important to her and had a right to be in his grandchild's life. I'm pretty sure therapists are supposed to be a bit more neutral. Anyway, she could tell I was irritated and asked what I was feeling. I said I felt deceived. I felt like my wife pretended to be someone and now I'm meeting the real her.

My wife started to cry and the therapist said my answer was unproductive. I asked my wife "what about you? How do you feel?" She said she felt lost. She said she's lost her family one by one because they did things she couldn't accept. Realizing the child she was carrying would never know her biological family upset her, and it made her wonder if her standards are too high.

The therapist jumped in and said it's important to meet people where they are out and cutting people out isn't the answer. The therapist ended things saying we had a lot of work to do but could fix things. When we left my wife said "she was very opinionated for a therapist." I agreed. She asked if we could go get brunch and just talk, and I agreed to that to.

We talked. I apologized for the way I spoke to her. She apologized for keeping secrets from me. I told her I would never be okay with her dad being part of our kids lives. She said she understood. I also said I thought it was a bad idea to go back to the old company, but ultimately that's her choice. She said she was going to tell her dad that meeting the baby isn't on the table and then see his reaction and go from there. I thanked her for telling me.

She asked me if I was thinking about leaving her. I was honest and said I had thought about it but that wasn't what I wanted. We both got very emotional. She asked if I loved her and I said yes. I asked if she loved my son, and she said yes. I asked if she thinks she'll love the baby more, and she said no. She hesitated, but I'm trying not to read into that.

I feel we made some progress and we will continue to work on our relationship (without the terrible therapist) and try to be our best for each other and the children.