Let me give some backstory for context.

My wife, Denise Elizabeth Testaberger (26 F, Usually has her cycle on the third week of the month, SSN# 639-86-367Q, went to Grey Creek HS in Grey Creek, Alabama) and I (M 30s, and I’ve been told by exes my penis is quite large) have been married for 22 years.

Every day I wait on her hand and foot, and make sure I give her piggy back rides from room to room so she doesn’t have to walk on her feet. I work 2 full time jobs and on Saturdays so she doesn’t have to work and can buy make up, get her hair done and buy whatever tight cocktail dresses that show off her busty chest that she wants.

Denise has a friend, Samantha Jones, and she has always tried to undermine me while also constantly staring at my girthy, larger than most, penis.

Samantha thinks that all wives should have a hall pass with whoever they want, and lately she’s hypnotized Denise with her slut wizardry to think the same way.

The girls have planned a 2 month trip to Monaco in two weeks on my dime.

I’ve grown concerned because last night while I was cooking and cleaning around the house during the 45 minutes I have off during the weekday, Denise’s phone accidentally fell off her bed while she was asleep and rolled all the way into the kitchen and unlocked right in my eye line. I wouldn’t have even noticed, but the phone literally slid in front of my face.

Anyway, it happened to open on a secret encrypted snapgram from Samantha. Samantha wants to spend a whole weekend inviting local cabana boys to massage their vaginas. I was GUTTED.

When I confronted Denise about it, she started screaming that I’m gaslighting her and practically trafficking her. She suggested her and my bank account go no contact while she’s in Monaco.

AITAH for not wanting my wife’s vagina to be massaged by a bunch of strangers in a different country?