you could call it nostalgia. remembering memories is such a bittersweet feeling. you're glad that it happened, but you're sad that it may not happen again.

so my mind did wander: 'how do i know if the last time was the last time?' is it just holding on to a particular memory all i could ever do. and with this I get scared, afraid to try things new.

it is not that i am counting the times i liked a particular thing. it is just the natural response is to want it to happen again. and i just can't accept the fact that it will never be the exact shape nor form.

i will have to convince myself that it is the truth. but every now and then, i wished the world will be a little kinder. i don't need answers why the universe allowed for a memory to take its place.

i just want, no, need the sense of comfort that whatever happens, it will be a memory worth holding on.

~

my heart is full yet empty at the same time