My boyfriend has an addiction for benzos and opiates that culminated into an 8-month long jail stint. He was just released Friday and spent the later months of his sentence focusing on working, working out and being really proud of his progress, and eventually actually thanked me for putting him in there (I ended up calling his probation officer on him after a particularly bad relapse, not realizing it would end in a jail sentence because I’m dumb).

He’s out, he seems a little different - a little more quiet and mature. He says he has no cravings or intent to use and I want to believe him and thought this was going to be a little easier but it’s already not.

This is the first night I’m back at work since his release and I’m already double-checking when he was last active online, dissecting his voice on our last phone call to see if he sounds sober or not, and he told me he might be playing golf with his brother tomorrow and my immediate reaction was he’s lying, he’s going to get high!

How do I stop doing this and making myself crazy? I really want to give him a clean slate but my mind isn’t letting me.

The entire first year of our relationship minus the jail stay was good days interrupted by me being blind-sided with a call from his mom about a relapse or coming to the realization on my own after weird texts from him or checking his location and seeing it was off. He had a really, really bad habit of constantly lying - only about drug use, never once about anything else - and I don’t know where to begin letting him rebuild that trust.

Any advice is really appreciated.