Copypasta from offmychest kasi hindi napansin don:

I'm just a year older than her, kung ibibilang yung months, almost 2 years din. We're so close in age that you'd wonder bakit mas gusto ko yung kuya namin who's 4 years older than me.

We're both clinically depressed. I know na we have different circumstances naman, still, bakit sobrang layo ng ugali nya eh same household lang naman kami, same parents. Same din kami ng household mula bata hanggang ngayon na graduates na kami, same din kami lagi ng schools. We're like twins na nga eh.

She has her own little world na napakahirap intindihin. Ang insensitive n'ya sa paligid n'ya. The other day may stray cats sa tindahan na pinuntahan namin, ayaw n'yang magbigay ng pagkain n'ya. I'm not bragging ha, but if I was her I'd give something kahit konti lang. Wala lang akong pera nung day na 'yon kaya wala akong naibigay. The sad part is, on all her socmeds, sinasabi n'ya na cat lover s'ya. Nakakainis kasi cat lover lang s'ya when it comes to that one particular cat we have (we have 6, isa lang love n'ya).

Palagi n'ya rin akong inuutusan. Kahit malapit lang yung tindahan ako pa rin uutusan n'ya, or mang aabala s'ya para magpasama sa tindahan.

Palagi rin s'yang nanghihiram ng charger, kahit lowbat ako. But when I borrowed her spare phone nagalit s'ya. Nagsumbong sa fling n'ya. She doesn't know na I know. Nababasa ko convo nila since nag-pop up sa spare phone n'ya habang ginagamit ko.

Kapag may gumagamit ng banyo (we only have one), minamadali n'ya yung nasa loob kapag gusto n'yang gamitin yung banyo. Whereas hindi ko s'ya minamadali before. Nag start lang ako na madaliin s'ya kasi ginagawa n'ya sa'min.

She's got this princess mindset. Hindi naman kami mayaman, hell, hindi nga kami "may kaya". Mahirap kami. She doesn't understand din na everyone struggles. Dapat palagi s'yang intindihin.

Don't get me wrong. I love my sister, especially since the day na we lost nanay, I took the nanay role sa bahay. Pero ang tiring kapag ganito ugali n'ya. If maisipan kong umalis sa province for work, paano s'ya? She doesn't even know how to cook, ako rin naglalaba ng mga damit n'ya. I'm fine with being the nanay of the house pero paano kapag nag decide akong harapin 'yung adult life? I don't want tatay to take my place for me. Tatay's old na.

I don't know how to talk to my sister din about sa ugali n'ya kasi she'll take it the wrong way, or baka hindi pa rin n'ya maintindihan. Exhausting lang. Aawayin lang ako n'on.

Hay. I wanna be an adult na. Gusto ko nang mag-solo.

Edit: if this is relevant, she's the religious one. I'm agnostic.