TLDR at the bottom

So this is my first Airbnb stay and i’m staying for 2 months. i’m just in a private room and my host and her dad live with me. At first my host seemed a little unfriendly and she told me to text her personally rather than using the airbnb messenger. At first, I complied but soon found that really weird and made me feel like she was doing it so that there’s no record of anything that can be used against her.

then i noticed that they never flush after they pee. As their guest i found that really gross cuz like i don’t want to see that and didn’t find it to be hospitable. i get that airbnb isn't a hotel, but isn't this like common courtesy for others in the house? i wanted to ask her to flush so i messaged her on the app and then she knocked on my door and we got to talk about it. it went fine, she told me she must have forgotten, except that is probably a lie. see, if it was a one time thing then, whatever. but when it happens every single time, i'm having a hard time believing it's not deliberate.

then she messages on the app and says "okay we just talked about this but next time, text me for any other need you have". and that's when things got weird because it started being clear to me that she doesn't want a record of anything. her tone was also sour and very passive aggressive. i think she may have thought i was someone easily taken advantage of, but i think she started realizing i'm smarter than i seem. this led to a series of app messages (shortened version):

Her: please text me next time and also we only clean once a week since this isn't a hotel so the bathroom may not be always clean

Me: i'd prefer to keep messaging on the app for safety and comfort. i'm not complaining about the state of the bathroom, i'm just asking that you flush after use

then, she knocked on my door, and starts yelling at me, it went a little like:

Her: this isn't a good look for you to be using the app like this on your first day of an extended stay and you aren't friendly and very confrontational

Me: i'm not trying to be confrontational, i just have this one ask, i haven't complained about anything else and i used to app because that's what airbnb recommends

basically, this lasts for like another 15 mins and i realized she can go forever, so i deescelate the situation and tell her "listen it's my first time using airbnb, i'm just doing what i thought was right". once she realized it was my first stay she calmed down and we ended things amicably

but now, i'm really concerned. the not flushing has still persisted. they are super unfriendly to be around (esp. the dad) and I feel like i'm walking on eggshells here. I have pictures of the toilet and i'm seeking advice on what to do next because i don't want this to be my living situation for the summer. do you think airbnb would issue a refund so i can be elsewhere?

TLDR: host wants me to exclusively text her and not use airbnb messaging app. host also doesn't want to flush after she uses bathroom and it led to a long argument. even after she agreed to flush, there is no change

Update: Airbnb Support person was really helpful and clearly on my side. To my dismay though, the host has disagreed to allow me to get a refund. I'm going to personally message her and see if anything gives. I may also try to further escalate the situation with airbnb because it's wild that I can't get a refund and have barely stayed 48 hours. Thankfully, I found a place to be at tonight andd for the next couple of days so I can leave ASAP.