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I don’t understand why I became so terrified to go outside. I don’t know why I became like this false version of myself. I don’t understand why …all my dreams of living abroad and being a painter just vaporized. I don’t get it. I don’t understand why I became a sad angry person and instead of the hopeful person I used to be.
Quitting my course was a terrible decision. Moving back home after college was a terrible decision. I went to thousands of dollars of therapy. Yes it helped on some level but I still remained terrified of the outside world and feeling deeply inauthentic. I’ve spent many many days feels deeply disconnected from my emotions and self , and isolated. Sigh.
Tdlr: rant
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- 10 months ago
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