Hi everyone, I’m an almost 19F who has been seeing a man in his late 40s for a few weeks now.

It has developed into an early stage relationship and he recently stated while we were discussing relationships and dynamics that doing stuff (as in for your partner) is “arbitrary”.

I’ll be honest, I saw red and was pretty annoyed. I told him that look, I’m not perfect but I still deserve a partner who, at times, will go out of his way for me. I won’t go into details here, BUT I have done a lot for him and opened up to him more and have grown a lot.

He only said back that “no one is perfect”. In my eyes, he completely disregarded my feelings so it just made me even more annoyed. Especially since he has called me immature before, which I am at times, but at least I can tell someone how I’m feeling and respond back well if they do the same.

So I told him that if you think that you can do things whenever it’s convenient for you in a relationship then you aren’t looking for a girlfriend. Because it doesn’t seem like it to me, more like he just wants someone to be at his beck and call.8

Now, I know I’m young which can make me more emotional, but I feel like my feelings are valid here. Could have approached it better, especially with me telling him that he should use this upcoming holiday weekend to think about what he wants, a girlfriend or not.

I’ll take most of the blame for this argument, but I feel like I’m inching closer to a larger issue with him. I’m trying my best to paint this situation as fairly as possible for him and I. I just need advice, or an idea about if what I’m feeling is me just overreacting or normal.