I'm a 19 y/o lesbian, and i've never find people my age attractive. I always fall for people who are much older; 24, 25, 26, 30, 35. Believe me, I GET that they don't find me desirable in a romantic or sexual way, because they see my as a child (this is also because i look younger), but this has affected me so much in my life. I don't date, or have romantic interests (at least not publicly), because of the shame of it. Most of my friends are older, i work and study with older people, so it just comes naturally for me. It's been a struggle for years, because i feel like i can't develop my sexuality normally, whenever i talk about it, on the internet or irl, people just tell me to go to therapy, or that it is not normal. The thing is, i don't have mommy issues, i'm psychologically fine. I've heard of lesbian couples with age gaps, but it just doesn't happend to me, and i trully can't build a connection with people my age as i do with older women.

I don't know if it has to do with my personality, or it's just something that it's not going to happend to me, or other women are also influenced by this taboo, or i'm misunderstanding the relationships i have, or i just look younger... I just know that i won't find a partner my age, and it's so frustrating. Any thoughs?