Although I've been fortunate enough to have enjoyed two affairs in the last four years (thanks to this sub) they were both with first-timers. It was exciting to explore with them and they were wonderful, fulfilling experiences, but with experience comes wisdom (supposedly). So, I'm approaching this search differently than my first two times around.

I'm holding out for someone that's been through this herself at least once and has cautionary tales of her own to share.

It might take longer to find a match, but at this stage, I'm willing to wait for the right person. If you swing at every pitch you'll eventually get some hits, but not before striking out quite a bit. We're here for a homerun.

My perfect pitch is someone between 40-55, with kids, and married. The ideal meet up area would be outside of Boston, somewhere north of the Pike to southern NH.

I'm a sucker for a pretty face and freckles always catch my eye. If you get enough exercise (couple times a week) to handle our extra curricular activities with ease, you probably have what I'd consider a sexy body. Chemistry and physical attraction are obviously vital, but I think confidence is the most important factor when it comes to being sexy. If you like to cook, we'll have something in common but it also means we don't have gym-perfect bodies. Your curves are ok!

You're ok with exchanging pics relatively early on to check on our potential (on TG, of course).

Drinks: yes, Smoking: no.

If you're a professional / office-type, it would probably help us relate to each other better.

Your situation at home is good, but you're here for obvious reasons. The ol' "neither one of us is looking to change our current situations" applies here. I like to think that good APs can even help each other with relationships at home. You're aware of the possibility / likelihood of developing feelings, but know how to keep them in check.

You're a thinker looking for an intelligent, interesting AP. You like to read, keep up on current events, and you're not afraid to try new things. You like to dive deep into conversations to really get to know each other or just chat about the latest odd-ball Netflix series we both watched or a new sexy song you added to our shared playlist.

Sound like you so far? We're halfway there - hopefully I sound like the one you're holding out for too:

49, 5'9", live & work north and west of Boston. Average build and lead the way on the mountain bike and hiking trails. I have a neatly trimmed (short) beard that shows some gray. Hazel eyes, decent tush, and a handsome face. Nice hair (but I'll admit that I cringe when I catch a glimpse from above in the grocery store check-out camera). 2 teens in HS, 1 good-boy dog, first marriage. In a dead bedroom with mismatched libidios (I'm not blameless for that situation but like most of us, it's complicated). Good home life, with no complaints other than lack of passion.

Dry sense of humor, conscientious and caring, good conversationalist but not demanding or clingy. Check ins 1-3 times a day, but also know sometimes we all need a short break for family life. Mostly type-A personality but wouldn't say gregarious.

I want to support your relationship at home despite out potential plans / activities and don't like to bash spouses. (If he pulls an asshole move though, you've got a shoulder to turn to and someone to listen). I can laugh at myself and my little quirks, and want to learn yours too.

I'm a curious person that likes to learn, I enjoy cars, cooking, reading, gardening, camping/hiking, art, have broad music tastes, love comedy, drinks, baseball, hockey, and a bunch of other stuff.

Looking for wild, passionate sex (who isn't, right?) but do you approach it with an almost competitive spirit? I.e., "Remember last time when we did such and such? I have an idea to make it even hotter!"

Curiosity and exploration are expected and kinks are welcome. You feeling comfortable enough to ask to try that "one thing" you've been thinking about ... is my thing.

Strong opsec should go without saying of course. My car doesn't track me, I escaped the kid-tracker app trap, I have hobbies and work patterns that support weekday rendezvous. Weekends are almost always out due to kids sport schedules but there are rare exceptions here & there. Overnights have been done, but are also rare.

Well, this definitely ended up much longer than expected but you made it to the end! Maybe we should chat!