31/m/usa

3 years ago the love of my life left me. I wont go into all the detail but we had dated for 2 years and I bought a ring and was going to propose the next month when she left. I've spent 3 years in deep depression and dealing with ptsd seeing a therapist and doing everything I can to move on. I'm at the point now where I think I will simply always love her and always see her as "the one that got away"

Now in my opinion its not fair to bring that into a new relationship, however I'm desperately tired of being alone and at 31 really think its time to start dating again and find someone that can fill the void but how do I do that? How do I date someone knew knowing that I'd rather be with her? How do I find someone to marry knowing that on my wedding day I will be wishing it was my ex? How do I forget this woman that has completely ruined my mental health and just move on?

I've tried sleeping with other women, I've tried online dating, I've tried drugs, I've tried getting fit, I've tried moving away, I've tried changing jobs and still she is on my mind all day everyday. Last night I dreamt she and I went on a date and I havent even seen her in 3 years! How do I stop this?!

Please help.