A friend of mine from university is now dating my ex-girlfriend, who I also met at university. We were all friends through our university years when I dated her for about a year. She broke up with me and I took it hard and he was one of the people that helped me get back out there and act as my wingman at bars with girls.

It has now been 3 years since we left university and I found out through her Instagram that they are now dating and just got a dog together. I’m not so petty to worry about “no sex with your bro’s ex” and everything, but my concern is that neither of them gave me a heads up. I have spoken to both of them quite little in the past 3 years admittedly since I moved out of town, but a heads up would have been nice even though I in no way expect him to have asked permission. I am worried about whether or not he didn’t reach out to let me know because he no longer considers me a friend.

Should I let them be and not say anything? Should I reach out and ask why he didn’t let me know to see if he still considers me a friend? I don’t want to be toxic and make their situation about me, but I want to know if we are still friends or if he didn’t reach out because he genuinely did not care how it would impact me.