I, 22M, have been with my GF for almost 3 years, and today I realized that I carried a lot of trauma from my previous relationship into this one, feeling pressured to enter a new one and make it better this time (obviously, for the wrong reasons). I now see that this could potentially be an opportunity for growth by ending the relationship.

Reasons why I consider leaving: I've often been treated disrespectfully, despite addressing it multiple times, it hasn't improved. We frequently argue, at least once a week, often about trivial things (I dislike arguing and am generally a very calm, spiritual person).

We have very different views in many aspects, be it experiences, politics, worldviews, etc., and there seems to be a lack of empathy to accept these differences without one of us feeling superior.

I am sexually frustrated, leading us to try things that have harmed me psychologically and emotionally. Although we've stopped, I'm still frustrated because she either lacks a high sexual interest in me or doesn't show it, making her sexually unattractive due to our frequent conflicts (we've talked about everything, but somehow, nothing changes).

I feel like I've become worse of a person since being with her, lacking safety as she is very impulsive, hindering my freedom to be authentic, express myself, and share my beliefs.

Since she entered my life, I've become completely unhappy, and the inner contentment I had when single is gone.

Why I'm still in the relationship: I fear not meeting someone else who genuinely cares for me, whether I have something or not. She's the first person who hasn't been put off or broken up with me. Admittedly, I've tried to end it many times but couldn't endure it, always running back to her. Honestly, having someone who stays is the core reason. I fear that no one else is interested in me since, besides her, I have no one in my life—no friends or acquaintances apart from my family. I'm 22 years old, turning 23 soon, and haven't had friendships for years simply because I don't like to commit or prioritize people who don't prioritize me, and, in general, I find the concept of friendship silly.

But why did I enter this relationship? Well, I think I wanted to prove to myself that I can treat someone well and be a good Boyfriend because I didn't take my last relationship seriously, and the person did. This made me feel guilty, so I tried it seriously this time and am breaking myself apart because it doesn't seem to fit.

I've put a lot of effort into this relationship and sacrificed a lot, but in the end, it doesn't seem to serve my well-being. Should I leave and not come back this time?

I seek advice, has anyone had a similar experience?