I started at the stattbof my 20's, I'm.not 27 and my arms are covered from wrist to shoulder in deep thick cuts. I thought that if I couldn't see the layers of skin when I cut then I was failing to even harm myself.

That feeling has never lest me, over the years I have cut and I have had moments when I didn't need to. Thr last year and a half I only cut once.

That was because of the support I had from my now ex girlfriend. She left me 2 days ago. I am so lost, so hurt and so empty. I feel like a void. It was an abusive relationship, but I thought if I did everything I could that would be enough. It never was. I love her more than life itself, but she left all the same.

I don't know how to go on, let alone how to process these feelings. But the urge to cut is hanging over me like a wraith and I can't stop myself from wanting this.