Hey fellow horn dogs. 50M here, recently made the decision to look for casual hookups to cure an almost year long drought. Because of my situation I decided to try AdultFriendFinder. Long story short: it worked. The reality is more complicated. Read on if you’re interested.

I live in a large metro area. I’m in a long term relationship with a partner that suggested I go get sex with other partners. I am a generally honest person so I disclosed that on AFF. First tip: no one wants an attached dude. Even though they are looking for casual hookups, the women overwhelmingly said being attached was a deal breaker. OK, strike one. Actually that’s strike 2.5 because being a 50M on AFF already stacks the deck.

Secondly, yes it really seems to be 99% scammers, fakes, weirdos, or just confusingly unsuitable chicks. I went through over 800 profiles to find one night of hot sex. It took me a week, and I reached out to countless women, most of the time getting no reply. This is not for the impatient or thin skinned. The replies I did get often tried to get me to go off site immediately, either to text directly, Google chat, telegram, snap, kik, email, and even Skype. Not all of these are actually scammers, just to make it more confusing. But most are. The strangest thing I see on there are countless profiles of medium good looking to seriously hot women advertising they want a romance, life partner, etc. Why? I started to think some of these are real. But who knows. I don’t understand what scam is best done by trying to get horny dudes that want a casual fuck to sign up for a marriage. Mixed in with these are endless instantly created GPT profiles that blather on about a set of qualities that sound exactly like AI generated bullshit. Lucky that makes these easy to ignore.

I paid for a few (maybe all) premium services because less than $100 for a chance at good sex feels like a bargain to me. Many would disagree. I don’t think it would be possible to succeed without that though. I also paid for the extra that lets free members chat to you. That may be important. I used a chin to just below the eyes headshot that shows enough to give an idea of my looks but not enough to identify me. Also added some torso shots. You can make a separate album which isn’t as easy to auto scroll through. I used that for some dick pics. I got about 1000 profile views on the main, and about 100 on the d. I think I’m a reasonably good looking dude, so I suppose this may have helped a bit. Of course the site is littered with super jacked dudes with 10 inch cocks so I’m not exactly competing directly in this category.

Basic strategy was to start with the local online profiles and IM or message them hoping for a quick reply. A lot of the regulars who are online all the time are unsuitable, probably for obvious reasons. So this strategy wasn’t a high hit rate, but I did meet a couple of cool chicks and one very patiently explained a lot of what she experienced on the site. Not directly relevant, but that was a moment I felt hope. Here was a real person telling me they had met other real people and that it was a great community (for her).

I will also admit that after the first day of doing this I felt a little sick inside the next day. I had met one incredibly rough on the eyes older lady that had gotten me to text directly with her before sending the face shot. It was the proverbial record scratch moment. Not gonna lie I searched deep in my soul to see if there was some way I could go through with that. I’m not sure if that was pity, desperation, a desire to feel like a good person, or what! But thankfully I came to my senses and noped out. I’ve had only one more record scratch since then, but I’m sure if I keep it up there will be many more. As a nice guy that doesn’t consider himself shallow, these are “character building” moments let’s say.

Okay, well I’ve rattled on long enough for one post. Probably too long, but if you’re still with me I’ll cut to the chase. How did I manage to execute on this perilous mission and emerge triumphant? I guess nothing more than patience, luck, and persistence. The one I met was 100 miles away, did not have a photo on her profile at all, and I think was a free member (thus the importance of paying to chat with free). Her profile spoke to me though. It instantly felt genuine. She replied and we hit it off in chat. I have no idea why other than intuition, but she soon convinced me she was real. I had a gut feeling to trust her that I never got with any others I interacted with. I think many of those others are real too, but I always felt wary. The next bonus was she sent me a pic and she was hot! At this point I was like a teenager on prom night. She also wanted a casual hookup, and basically was just horny AF and needing discretion. The only catch was the timing had to be that night. She also wanted to meet in a bar for safety and to have a chance to check me out and emergency abort if need be. But there was almost no time to get there, get condoms, get a hotel, and get to the bar before they closed. Any of them. However after working each other up in chat, we both decided fuck it let’s try. I drove about 100mph and made it in the nick of time. Actually the last bar was open but not letting anyone else in. We met out front, and she was cute. Win. Luckily she decided to come to the hotel anyway. And the rest is history.