This post has been de-listed
It is no longer included in search results and normal feeds (front page, hot posts, subreddit posts, etc). It remains visible only via the author's post history.
After visiting a couple subreddits about adoption, I'm struggling with whether or not it's ethical. A little background, my husband and I are looking to adopt an older child from foster care who already has a TPR. We are both black and would like to adopt a black child. Believe it or not, black people do have a culture in the US and it's important that kids are tought about it. But as we get things rolling with agencies, I'm becoming more aware of just how negative and icky adoption can be. The alternative is of course aging out of the system but is that really so bad? Who am I to decide that adoption is the best choice for a kid? And for the kid, adoption day must feel like a damn funeral. Is that something I should be willing to support?
My late husband was adopted at five years old out of foster care. He was getting abused severely in foster care and struggled a lot bonding to his late mother (yes, they’re both dead now). after her death, he really missed her though and wished he had her back. I think it’s a really complicated issue. There’s not one right answer.
my late husband and I have a daughter, and when he passed, she was four months old. My new husband has adopted her. Not legally, but in Texas he claims her on his taxes. So I guess “common law adoption”. That works for us. Keeping her last name is important to me and also making sure she sees her family in California when she’s old enough to fly out there. Right now they send gifts and letters and she is aware that they love her.
Subreddit
Post Details
- Posted
- 2 months ago
- Reddit URL
- View post on reddit.com
- External URL
- reddit.com/r/Adoption/co...