Sharing my story on ADHD medication in case it can help someone else.

As a precursor, I want to note that these medications can impact everyone in very different ways. For many, it works absolute wonders in improving your life. I don’t want to make anyone question their decisions but just provide an additional source of context.

I had an incredible relationship where my partner and I were incredibly in love with each other. She and I were just so happy together. It was the type of romance where we both knew we wanted to be life partners within 6 months of dating. We had future plans together and were on the same page about everything. She truly felt like and still feels like my other half.

During a good portion of our relationship, I was taking Adderall to manage my ADHD symptoms. I was taking a relatively low dosage since that’s all I really needed. Overall, it didn’t have a majorly significant impact on our relationship. As we approached the 1.5 year mark of our relationship, I decided to up the dose since the lower dosage was feeling less effective. This definitely helped me manage my symptoms better, but in retrospect is what ultimately ruined my relationship.

The higher dosage made me far more interested in getting work done and pay way less attention to my girlfriend. It got to the point where I started avoiding phone calls with her at times since I just didn’t want to be bothered. I definitely became more irritable as a person. The meds also gave me the side effect of feeling less empathetic towards her feelings, less excited to do things with her. Overtime I became more and more irritated with her and felt like we were growing apart. Ultimately, I ended the relationship with her as it felt like an incompatibility issue when in reality it wasn’t. We had never had such issues in the past.

I wasn’t able to understand the true impact of what the meds did to my personality until over a year later. Losing this incredible relationship is something I may regret for the rest of my life. I know that if I had just taken a break from my meds and actively thought about my relationship with her, this never would have happened. And at this point, it is far too late to fix, she has moved on.

I know that if I had seen a post like this, I would’ve been able to save my relationship. These medications can impact our emotions at such a fundamental level we don’t even understand it’s happening. It may be too late for me, but I hope this post can help others make educated decisions.

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