Context: You met your husband in college. He was a bit gruff, then sweet, then needy... he was a lot, but you loved him nonetheless and your marriage has been blissful. You trust him with everything, but... should you?

Setting: Home

Tags: [MM4A][Lovers to ?][Yandere Twin Speakers][Unaware Listener][Double Trouble][Twins][Cuddles][Kisses][Confession][Polyamory(?)][Spicy][Marital Bliss(?)][Lies][But Also Love][Obsession][Desperate][Love-Triangle][Kind Of][CW: Mention of Assassination]

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***

[T1] = The younger twin, a sweetheart

[T2] = The older twin, certified dommy Daddy

***

[Scene opens in your bedroom]

[SFX: Early morning birds]

[You stir as you realize something sharp is nibbling your shoulder. As you bat at it, your husband laughs]

[T1] “Good morning, love… Sorry, your bare shoulder just looked so tantalizing. I just had to nibble it.”

[Pause]

[He laughs as you gently bap his face with a pillow]

[T1] “OK, OK, I’m sorry… Is it OK if I get the first shower? I’m going to need a cold one, anywho.”

[Pause]

[T1] “Thank you, babydoll! Mwah! Feel free to get a bit more sleep, OK? Love you!”

[He heads into the bathroom, humming to himself]

[SFX: The shower turning on and humming]

[It’s still early and you figure a tiny bit more sleep won’t hurt]

[SFX: The shower and humming growing quieter as the Listener passes back out]

…

[T2] “Hey… HEY!”

[You sit up, startled, and come nose-to-nose with your husband]

[Pause!]

[T2] “Hmph. Lazy bones. Went back to sleep and left me in the shower all by myself. Ice-cold water didn’t do anything for me.”

[...]

[Your boyfriend grins down at you, eyes cool]

[T2] “Is that why I’m pinning you down…? Hehe, maybe. Don’t you like it? You always like it when I’m more… dominant. And I dried off this time before pouncing on you!”

[SFX: A faint noise from the kitchen]

[Pause?]

[Your boyfriend doesn’t even turn his gaze away or frown]

[T2] “Did I hear the plates being moved in the kitchen?”

[He pauses and his grin grows a little smarmy, teasing]

[T2] “NoOoo, of course not. Now, how’s about losing that shirt, hm?”

[Pause!]

[Your husband sighs and sits up]

[T2] “Fine, I’ll check it out. You’re so easily spooked, you know? It’s just the house settling. But I’d be a bad husband if I didn’t play the brave knight, yeah? You snuggle up under the covers, and I’ll check it out.”

[SFX: The bed creaking and his footsteps receding]

[You try and get comfortable again but feel something cold and a little wet on your neck. Naturally, you jump up with a yelp]

[T1] “Whoa! Sorry, honey, it’s just me! Just got out of the shower. Sorry, sorry, wet kisses aren’t fun kisses.”

[...????]

[T1] “Huh? I said I was going to check out a noise? What no-?”

[Before you can figure things out, your… husband(?) runs into the room, furious]

[T2] “What’s going on?! Who’s hurting my ba-...”

[He stops dead as he sees the two of you]

[T2] “Uh…”

[T1] “Fuck.”

[T2] “You idiot, you were supposed to coordinate today!”

[T1] “You said you’d do it after I did the dishes for you, idiot!”

[Pause…]

[You look between the two men in disbelief. Your husband and… your husband…?]

[T1] “...OK, we know this looks bad.”

[T2] “Like, really bad.”

[T1] “B-But, we have an explanation! Why, um… Why you have two husbands…”

[Pause!]

[T2, with a sigh] “No, we’re not “pod people”, this isn’t shadow clone shenanigans, we’re not bodysnatchers, nor all the sci-fi and horror movie tropes. We’re just… identical twins.”

[Pause?]

[T1] “We started playing this prank in college because no one could tell us apart. Like, at all, so we thought it’d be fun to mess with people, you know? It just became a routine and, well, it continued when T met you at that silly bake sale. You two hit it off, and I was supportive of the relationship, but… Then you accidentally stumbled into me at a party after T had left in a huff over something stupid-”.

[Pause]

[T1] “Ugh, yes, it was the stupid tantrum over that stupid video game. T’s always been the hothead… but he was in love with you, and he sent me in to try and talk to you because he was legitimately scared you two would break up. I’m the mediator, always have been, so I went in and fixed things… I guess a little too much, because the next thing I knew, you were kissing me.”

[...]

[T2] “Tch, trust me, I kicked his ass the next morning when I found out… but what was I meant to say? You thought he was me, and you had every right to. I told him to back off…”

[Your husband sighs and looks away]

[T2] “But he fell in love with you.”

[T1] “But I fell in love with you, yeah… And, it turns out, neither of us was willing to let go. We argued for days, months, even years… We both loved you, and we were about at our breaking point. I was ready to give T an ultimatum three months before he proposed. To expose all of this… even knowing you’d no doubt leave us both.”

[T2] “I was just going to kill him, hehe.”

[Pause?]

[T1] “Wait, whaha-?”

[T2] “Don’t worry about it, little bro. But, uh, yeah. We’re twins. We both work different jobs and make decent incomes. We both do our best to be good husbands, but, you know… We can’t exactly take you home to meet Mom and Pop, can we?”

[...]

[T1] “Yyeeaaahhh… I know we said we were kind of estranged but, we really didn’t know how to explain to you or them: “Hey guys, turns out your sons fell in love with the same person to the point of getting desperately possessive and obsessed and have been living in a lie-filled but blissful polyamorous relationship that our partner thought was monogamous. No big deal, right?”

[T2 throws his hands up with a big, goofy smile] “Semantics! It’s all semantics. Point is, we both love you and neither of us is going anywhere…”

[...]

[T1] “Oh, no, we’re not going to hurt you, sweetheart. We’d never do that.”

[T2] “Not in non-sexy ways, anywho. If you want to, we can go through the whole divorce process and get out of your life. We know this has to be a lot and probably really hurtful… Orrr…”

[T1] “Orrrr…”

[T2] “We could make an offer that we’ll do whatever you want until you trust again. No questions asked, no complaints. Massages, vacations, fancy gifts, new car… we’ll do it.”

[T1] “Anything.”

[T2] “We just want you to let us keep loving you.”

[You look between the two of them as they sit on either side of you]

[SFX: The bed creaking]

[T2, breathier] “Anything.”

[T1] “Absolutely anything…”

[They snuggle up to you, smiling their goofy smiles in contentment while you try and process your entire life]

[T1] “Love you, Beanie-Baby.”

[T2] “Love you, Cuddle-Muffin.”

[....]

[SFX: The TV switching on]

[T2] “Yessss, lazy day in bed.”

[T1] “I knew you’d see things our way, Beanie-Baby! You’re perfect, of course, you would.”

[You think you say something in response but you have no idea what. You have no idea what ANYTHING is anymore]

[T2] “I’ll run you a nice bath later, don’t worry.”

[T1] “And I’ll give you one of those nice back rubs, OK?”

[Pause]

[T1] “Awww!”

[T2] “We love you, too!”

[You guess it could be worse]

[The End]