Part 1

Context: You bought a nice, new house a while ago. It was a good deal for how massively huge it is. Way too big for one person. So, you did the reasonable thing, went to a pet shop and picked out some pets! Your pup, Woofles, your Kingsnake, Forky, and your very relaxed tarantula, Charlie. They've all been excellent company and you've come to love one another like family... It'd be a real shame if they were to turn into hot monster men. Actually, they did do that, and it's super weird. At this point, you just hope that things don't get weirder. You sweet, summer child.

Setting: Home/The pet shop

Tags: [MMMM4A][Friends to More][Werewolf Speaker][Naga Speaker][Dryder Speaker][Male Witch Speaker][Human Master Listener][Himbo][Tsundere][Kuudere][Supernatural][Pets to People][Flirting][VERY Spicy][Competing][Transformation][Light Comedy][Cuddles][Reverse Comfort][CW: Spicy Monster Boys/Murder]

Usage: You may tweak or record this script. Gender flipping is OK! Please credit me if you use this script in any of your projects. If you would like to use this script for a paywalled recording, please note:

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[W] = Woofles, your dog. Yes, I am serious

[F] = Forky, the snake

[C] = Charlie, the tarantula

[P] = The pet shop owner, a massive douche

[Scene opens in your bedroom]

[SFX: Snoring]

[You slowly wake up, convinced yesterday was simply a bad dream. At least, until you realize you’re being snuggled on all sides]

[SFX: The Listener sitting up hurriedly]

[C] “Shh, Master. It’s just us. Woofles is on your right and Forky is on your left.”

[Charlie nods to you, somewhat resting by the bed]

[C] “Yes, I am still a Dryder, please do not scream. I am aware that I am a… how does Forky put it… “big spider boi”.”

[Pause?]

[Charlie perks an eyebrow]

[C] “Why did I not join in the cuddling? Master, with due respect, I am a Goliath bird-eating spider, the largest of the Theraphosidae family. I would not fit in bed unless it was customized to accommodate my size.”

[He smiles a very fanged smile]

[Pause]

[C] “Hmhmhm… How cute. You may adopt birds, if you wish, Master. I don’t fancy eating harpies, however, and they can be very… fussy.”

[Pause?]

[C] “Oh, don’t fret about feeding us. I’ve been doing accountant work since settling in yesterday and have budgeted appropriately. If we’re careful, we could save up for that vacation you wanted. Do not fret, I will not accompany you so as to respect your boundaries.”

[Pause???]

[Charlie looks at you and, despite his cool demeanor, you can see pain in his eyes]

[C] “Master, do not be ridiculous. No one would want a Dryder at their side. No, I enjoy my corner here. It’s dark, it’s quiet, and it’s close to you.”

[Forky stretches and groans at your side, tongue tickling you a bit]

[F] “Mmhm, no one who’s ssssane likes spiders.”

[Pause]

[F] “Uhh… Sorry Masters, I forgot you willingly adopted Charlie. It’s just most of the spiders at the shop usually get squashed or thrown outssss.”

[Woofles rumbles as you try and scramble out of bed]

[W] “Nuuu, more cuddles. All the cuddles.”

[C] “Master, calm yourself. There’s nothing to be done for the others.”

[Pause!]

[Your “boys” watch as you scramble around and get dressed, somehow forgetting there are three monster boys watching this occur]

[F] “Master’s butt!”

[W] “Full moon!”

[C] “Master, your buttocks are exposed.”

[Pause!]

[W] “Get the car? WOOO, CAR RIDE!”

[SFX: A grown werewolf bounding down the stairs]

[C] “Master, your tire is flat. I intended to fix it this morning but I just woke up and-".

[F] “Master can ride on your big, fat butt, Charlie!”

[Charlie glares at him but remains calm]

[C] “This is not my “butt”, Forky, it’s my thorax.”

[SFX: A muffled crash]

[You exchange looks and hurry downstairs to find your car solidly buried in the garage door]

[W] “...So, uh, I crashed the car a little…”

[C] “Woofles…”

[F] “HAH! Dumb baka!”

[W] “I’ll fix it later! C’mon, we gots to go! Master said!”

[F] “How are we meant to do thats??? We can’t take public transports!”

[All three of you look to Charlie]

[C] “...why are you looking at me like that.”

[F] “Cause we need your thicc spider butt! Vamos hermanos!”

[Charlie inhales through his nose and kneels, looking sufficiently annoyed at being the whole ass carpool]

[W] “Mush, spider boi!”

[C] “No one would find either of your bodies…”

[W] “What.”

[F] “W-Wait, whaha-?”

[C] “Hold on, Master. I will make haste.”

[And he does, surprisingly fast as you all move toward the city together]

[Scene transitions to the pet shop]

[SFX: A door chime]

[The old witch squints at you as you meander in, trying to look “super innocent” while the others wait outside and out of sight]

[P] “Welcome to the Peculiar Pet Shop… Wait, you again? Godamn, you adopted three of my specimens just last month! They giving you trouble? Any decent gun will take care of it, just make sure you aim for the head. Wait… Oh, you took Charlie, huh? Yeah, try coating where he walks with diatomaceous earth powder. Will puncture his stupid insect legs.”

[...]

[The witch snorts in response, his eyes twinkling with mischief]

[P] “What happens to the pets no one adopts? Oh, same as any shelter. I either let them test their luck on the streets or they die. Some people like pitting them against each other in fights.”

[!!!]

[P] “Barbaric? Oh, love, it’s just the nature of the business. Try not to cry. Look, see this little guy here? This writhing little lizard, squealing in pain? Mmhm, the kind thing to do here is to squash the little bastard. He won’t heal…”

[!!!!]

[The witch cackles maniacally and retrieves what looks like a meat hammer]

[P] “Relax, love. Let me deal with him and then we can t-”.

[You rush forward and grab the hammer away from him]

[P] “Hey! Give me back the hammer! Right this instant!”

[SFX: A hollow, grotesque thunk]

[You bring the hammer up and bonk the Witch as hard as you can with it. He stumbles back, eyes spinning and collapses back with a groan against the wall. Forky and Woofles hurry in the front door, in disbelief]

[SFX: The door chime protesting]

[F] “Holy voles! You hit hims with his hammers!”

[W] “OHHH, GET SAUCED, WITCH BOY! Master, you straight up murdered a guy! Nice!”

[You think you’re going to be sick]

[F] “Master…? You OKs?”

[Charlie emerges from the back of the shop, raises an eyebrow at the Witch, then turns to you]

[W] “Uh, Charlie? How did you come from the back like that?”

[C] “I’m a spider. Woofles, secure the dragonling on the counter. Gently. Forky, lock up the shop and draw the blinds. Master, come with me… Oh, you’re in shock. I forget how murder impacts humans. Here, I’ll pick you up.”

[He does and carries you into the back, sitting you down in the office]

[C] “Here are some papers. Sign here, here, here, and… initial here.”

[SFX: Pen scrawling]

[C] “Good. Congratulations, you now own this pet shop.”

[?!?!!?]

[C] “Master.”

[He gently tilts your face up to look at him, voice gentle]

[C] “I will handle the shop if you are not able… but we have never seen someone so caring and kind. It is clear that, while you aren’t entirely comfortable with our biological differences, you still care greatly for our safety and wellbeing. As I said, I will handle the care, if you are uncomfortable. I will, ah… handle the corpse as well.”

[...?]

[C] “...How? Master… Please don’t ask questions we both know you do not want answers to. You have three carnivorous adoptees. We’ll handle it.”

[...]

[C] “What if he isn’t dead? Well… he’ll probably die once his insides, ahem, liquify.”

[He looks away, ashamed. Almost cutely embarrassed]

[C] “Apologies for my… disgusting nature.”

[You rest your hand on his arm and he flinches]

[Pause]

[C] “...Thank you, Master… Now, I need to assist with the dragonling on the counter. I’ve no doubt that that monster injured him trying to hobble his ability to fly… I almost hope the little fuck is alive just so he can suffocate in my gullet.”

[...]

[Charlie chuckles]

[C] “Really, Master? My two front legs rearing up is ‘cute’? Hmhm… You are a strange one. Come, let’s get this sorted.”

[He heads to the front and you linger in the office, still dazed]

[...]

[You guess you own a pet shop full of monster boys and girls now]

[To be continued?]