Context: You were with your ex for quite some time. More good times than bad, but the bad times were, unfortunately, pretty bad. Bad enough that you broke up with him and tried to move on with your life. One of your favorite memories with him is coming to an ice skating rink when everyone else has left and counting down the new year. It's New Years Eve this very night and you've decided to keep up the tradition, even if it hurts. But you might not be the only person there tonight.

Setting: A local ice skating rink

Tags: [M4A][Exes to Lovers][Ex-Boyfriend Speaker][Forgiving Listener][Making Up][Being Better][I Miss You][Angst][Apologetic][Reminiscing][Another Chance?][Rekindling Romance][CW: Angst/Mentions of Mental Illness]

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***

[Scene opens on an abandoned skating rink in a large park]

[SFX: Ice skating]

[You arrive to the skating rink local to the park and pause as a familiar man skates by]

“Hey…”

[Pause]

“No, you don’t need to leave… I was hoping you’d show up, actually. Since the breakup, we haven’t really… I mean, it’s probably stupid to have assumed you’d want to keep staying up and chatting with me until 3 AM… This used to be our tradition. Five years of skating together here when everyone else left…”

[He sighs, rubbing the back of his head]

“...Please, will you… will you skate with me? I promise I won’t crowd you or plead with you to forgive me. I know I don’t deserve it.”

[SFX: More skating sounds]

[Your ex gives a tired smile]

“Thank you. You have no idea how happy I am just to see you again.”

[You both skate in silence for a bit before you manage to ask him:]

“How have I been…? Eheh. I wish I could say “good”, but I’m not… It’s not your fault, of course, I’ve just been getting an ass-kicking by reality. Been realizing how much you did for me. Did when I had never even asked… I’m sorry, I’m being rude all over again. How have you been? Ooh, careful.”

[He reaches out and takes your hand, steering you away from the wall]

“There we go. Sorry I took your hand, I just didn’t want you to hit the wall. I’m letting go. Now, how have you been?”

[Pause]

[He acknowledges you while you talk, focused on you. When you catch his gaze, his eyes are watery]

[...?]

“Huh? Crying? Oh, geeze, haha. Sorry. I was listening, I promise. The light from the skyscrapers hit your eyes and just made them glow. I-It was really pretty. Damnit, I’m sorry. I thought I’d be ready to see you again… Guess I was wrong, eh? So… Can I ask why you came out here tonight?”

[Pause]

“You like this tradition, huh? It doesn’t… hurt to do this?”

[Pause]

“Mmh… I guess anything that we used to do together would sting just a touch. You remember Romero’s BLOOM? Haha, yeah, the weirdly gothic flower boutique. I went in there to get a gift for a coworker that was retiring and just broke down sobbing in front of the man himself, Romero. He awkwardly patted me on the head with a gunshot rose and gave me a gingerbread cookie.”

[Pause]

[Your ex chuckles]

“Yeah, well, Ethel in accounting really appreciated the Death Daisies bouquet I got her, thanks. You remember Ethel, right? Haha, yeah, the one in the metal band. She, um… says hi. Oh, hang on, you’re still listing a little. Can I put my arm around your waist for a second? Totally OK, if not.”

[Pause]

“Thank you, sweeth-. Um… Thank you.”

[He sighs and turns to you, skating backwards as he holds your waist]

“... I know you don’t owe me any more of your time, but, please… Can I just say my piece, please? Then I’ll leave you alone for good. Is that OK?”

[Pause]

[Another sigh before he takes a shaky break]

“... I’m so sorry that I made you feel alone when you always came running to have my back. I’m sorry I was so cranky and moody… You were right. You always are right. You kept telling me to see a doctor about my symptoms, and I did. I had nothing left to lose… You were right. They put me with a therapist, I’m on meds now, and even though it’s a struggle, I’m doing better. I just… I wish I’d done it sooner. That moment you said “We need to talk”, I panicked. I knew what it was about. I knew I’d lost you. Knew that I’d exhausted my last last last chance. That’s why I didn’t seem to care… I was stunned.”

[Pause…]

[He laughs a little and wipes his eyes]

“R-Really? You’re proud of me? Wow… That means the world coming from you. I just… I wish I hadn’t squandered every single moment I had left with you. That my stupid, broken brain didn’t make this so hard… That my shame kept me from trying to apologize for six fucking months. You deserved an apology for all the lost time you put into being with me. I miss you every moment of every day, but I still just want you to be happy, healthy, and safe… even if that means I’m not part of it.”

[Pause…]

“I do mean it. Every word of it. I recognized that I was the problem in our relationship and that it was on me to be better. I didn’t until you were gone, and it kills me. I know we had more good moments than bad, and the memories we made are so beautiful. I cherish them so much more now.”

[...?]

[He goes quiet, still leading you around the rink expertly]

“D-Do… I still love you…?”

[His smile is immensely sad and he wipes his eyes again]

“Christ, I’m so obvious… Of course I still love you, sweetheart. That’s never going to fade away but… I’m kind of glad it won’t. It hurts to not feel your hair on my pillow, to see your smile when I make waffles, to hear you laugh loudly at silly memes and then get embarrassed when you think you’re laughing too loudly, but I'd rather suffer every day than forget a moment of the time you gave me."

[Pause]

[His voice turns breathless]

“Y-You… You still love me, too…?”

[He stops skating and the sudden jolt sends you both toppling. He lands partially atop you, clutching you close]

“Hang on, let me st- WHOA! Oww… No, I got you, baby. I got you… Sorry I landed on top of you, are you OK?”

[Pause…]

“...God, you’re so beautiful.”

[Snowflakes have begun to sway gently down to the ground and some of them cling to his hair]

“...I love you. So, so much…”

[He breaks, holding you close and sobbing. You embrace him back]

[Pause]

“P-Please… Please, do you think we could try again? Please, I’ll do anyth-mmph!”

[You kiss him and he hungrily kisses you back as more and more snow falls atop the two of you. You’re both breathless as you part]

“...Come back home, baby. Please. We’re both starting to go a bit numb. So… Won’t you come home with me? I’ll make waffles tomorrow, hehe.”

[<3 Pause <3]

“Here, let me pick you up. Mmh! There we go. C’mon…”

[SFX: Skating]

[Pause]

“Hm? Oh, haha… I love you, too, baby. And a Happy New Year to you too, even if it's a few hours late. That's OK, though... You're always worth the wait.”

[The End]