[Loving] Hey, Cuddle-Bug. What are you doing down here? Isn’t your [Mom/Dad] supposed to be watching you?

[Pause]

[She/He] fell asleep, huh? Poor darling.

[Pause]

No worries, okay? I think your [Mom/Dad] is due for a power nap. [She/He] wasn’t really sleeping when you were missing. [She/He] was too busy looking for you.

But now that we’ve found you safe and sound, [her/his] body’s playing catch-up. You can’t stay awake forever, you know. That’s why some little bugs have a bedtime.

[Pause]

Yep, that’s the Bad Man. He’s not so scary now, is he?

[Pause]

Didn’t think so.

[Pause]

He seems smaller? Well, sometimes, when people act big, they seem big. But you put them someplace else, and you realize they were never all that big in the first place. Right now, he probably thinks I’m big, too, because I’m the one who caught him and tied him up. Does that make sense?

[Pause]

What am I doing with him? Hmm…it’s a little like school. He needs to learn a lesson, so I’m gonna teach him.

[Pause]

If he had been taught better than to kidnap little kids and really learned that lesson, then he wouldn’t have done it, right?

[Short Pause]

I’m gonna make sure he learns so that he never, ever does something like this again. And maybe, he can be a good example for some other people.

[Pause]

You are so smart! High five.

[FX: High five]

We should probably go back upstairs, Bug. He can wait until later.

[Pause]

No, I don’t think your [Mom/Dad] would like it if you stayed while I taught the Bad Man his lesson. You might be just a little too young for that stuff.

[Pause]

You know I can’t say no to those eyes. Fine, just a little.

[Cutesy] Do you want to help [Daddy/Mommy] break his fingers?

[Pause]

Awesome! You’re a trooper. Okay, we’ve already got a rag in his mouth. He might shout, but the rag will keep him from yelling too loud. Plus, it means he won’t accidentally bite his tongue. That would probably hurt, right?

[Pause]

Exactly. We want to make sure that he doesn’t hurt more than he has to.

Now, breaking fingers is a lot simpler than you might think. It’s like snapping a baby carrot in half. Not super easy, but doable. Let’s start with the pinky. How about you give it a try?

[FX: Crack]

Pretty good for your first time. Especially since you’re still so little. It’s way easier once your hands are bigger and stronger. It looks like you popped it out of the joint, but I like to get a nice snap, right along the bone. Like this!

[FX: Crack]

Doesn’t that sound nice? Do you want to give it another try?

[FX: Crack]

Wow! You did such a good job, buddy! Okay, one more…

[FX: Crack]

[Warm] There you go. Not so hard once you’ve got the hang of it, right?

It’s time to go upstairs. I mean it this time. No puppy dog eyes. I’m gonna put together a real nice lunch for you and [Mom/Dad]. And I need my helper, so come on.