Context: You are at the wedding of an old flame, a man who has been your friend long before the two of you broke up, and even after. You showed up to support him, even though he's acting a bit odd. What you thought was nerves was actually something a lot more insidious was going on, something pertaining to someone wanting to crash the wedding.

Setting: A park wedding/a sandwich shop

Tags: [MM4F][Strangers to ?][Old Flame Speaker][Himbo Delinquent Speaker][Old Flame Listener][Wedding][Old Feelings][Himbo][Crashing The Party][Professionals Have Standards][Flirting][Spicy][Chaos Energy][Protective][CW: Betrayal]

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***

[G] = The Groom

All unmarked text is Mikey

***

[Scene opens in a nice park wedding]

[SFX: General wedding ambiance]

[The groom approaches you with a big smile]

[G] “Man, I am SO glad you could make it to the wedding! I know it was a lot to ask you to just be here. You’re a real pal, you know that?”

[Pause?]

[The groom glances behind him toward a very grouchy looking bride]

[G] “Yeeahhh, Sarah still kind of hates you… I guess she thinks that a guy and a girl can’t be besties, hehe. You know how she can be…”

[Pause?]

[He smiles weakly]

[G] “Am I OK? I, um… Yeah. We’re just trying to get through the wedding without anything going too wrong, you know? Her crazy family, my crazy family… you’re one of the only sane people here.”

[His smile turns warm and he hugs you]

[G] “Thanks for being here, Sweetheart. I know things between us ended a long time ago, but I’m still glad we could stay friends. I’m glad we got to be there for each other through some tough years. And, ah… you look really nice in the bridesmaid dress. Even if Sarah picked the ugliest shade of salmon possible.”

[There’s a pause and it takes you a moment to realize he’s staring at you, eyes soft]

[G] “I… Um… I feel like there’s something we should talk ab-”.

[SFX: People yelping in surprise]

[You both jump as a rather built, delinquent looking man rushes into the fray and shouts:]

“WEDDING CRASHER!!!”

[There’s a bit of a panic as the man runs about, yelling and generally making something of a mess. As others run off, you notice that the man, crazy as he may be, isn’t really hurting anyone]

[G] “Who is this lunatic?! H-Hey, wait, don’t go talk to him!”

[The delinquent flashes a wild but friendly grin at you]

“Heya! You must be one of the bridesmaids, right? Hang on, let me just get my little pad out.”

[He takes out a notepad, dons some reading glasses and flips through it]

“Let’s see… “Arrive at 12:00, before the vows, and make as big of a mess as possible”. Hmm, I don’t see any notes about throwing bridesmaids around or in the fountain or river… Buuuuut, for such a pretty lady, I reckon I could toss you around a bit…”

[He winks]

“Iffin you were wanting to book me for the rest of the afternoon, I could see about lending my services. Price is usually a hundred, but for you, I’ll take a few smooches.”

[Pause???]

[The man laughs and runs his hand through his hair]

“Who the Hell am I? Well, I’m Mikey! I provide services of the “I will come and mess shit up for you” variety. Bad date? I’ll cause a scene. Want to impress a lady by beating up a thug? I got you, bro. Want to stop a wedding you regret to try and get back with your ex? Here for it!”

[...?]

[Mikey pauses, fist poised to snap the neck of the ice swan]

“That last one sounded awfully specific? Oh. Ohhhh. You’re the ex… Damn, well, this is awkward. Bro was meant to run over and “beat me up” to “protect you”, haha. But hey, now you get the chance to get back together with him, right? He sounded super excited about it and said you would be too!”

[...]

[Mikey’s smile fades slowly]

“Wait, whoa… He didn’t tell you? Ayy no. No, no, no, Michaelis Steven Wilkins does NOT tolerate dishonesty in that sense. Like, yeah, I’m here under kind of false pretenses but I also love to break shit, so… Is that him? The guy comforting the lady who’s makeup is running?”

[...]

[Mikey leans down until he can see your facial expression, his own unreadable]

“...Alright, I think I’ve seen enough. Hey, buddy!”

[You try and grab his rather muscular arm as he marches over to your oldest friend and slaps a wad of cash against his chest]

[G] “Hey, man, what the Hell?!”

“Man up and dump this lady if you don’t love her, dude. You told me that I’d be rescuing you from some crappy relationship so you could be with the love of your life. You gave the impression you’d already tried to leave this woman and that you were “desperate” to get away.”

[You’ve never seen your oldest friend pale like that nor have you ever seen Sarah look apoplectic]

[G] “I-It’s… It’s not like that, I swear! Sweetheart-!”

[Mikey turns back and stomps your way, shaking his head]

“Yo, pretty lady, you wanna bail? I ain’t about to leave you alone with some psychopath that brings you here under false pretenses. C’mon, I know a good sandwich place. My treat.”

[You exchange looks with your friend(?), shake your head and take the arm Mikey is offering]

[G] “Sweetheart!!”

“What a fucking putz… Sheesh. C’mon, cutie. Mikey’s got ya.”

[You walk with him, a bit dazed by the turn of events, before you finally manage to ask:]

“Huh? How come I do this? Well… They say do a job you love and you’ll never work a day in your life, right? What can I say. I’m the middle child in a family of seven, my dear, three girls, four boys! And, lemme tell you, when all your sisters are younger than you, the proper thing to do is make sure you’re built to protect ‘em. That involved fighting my Dad a lot. Then both stepdads. Ah… What can I say, I’m protective. It’s why I couldn’t leave you there with that guy, I know guys like that. Always twisting people up, not able to say what they mean and making other people freaking pay for it. Just man up, say what you wanna say, you know? Like, looking at you, I totally get why he regrets what he gave up, but that don’t make it right.”

[SFX: A bell chime]

“Here we are. You sit wherever you want, Sweetheart. Getcha a soda or something, if that bridesmaid dress doesn’t mind mustard and carbonated sugar, hehe.”

[You sit and he goes and orders some food while you look out the window, jumping a bit as he sits back down]

“Here ya go, sugar.”

[Pause]

“Heh, you’re welcome, it’s no big. This was my lone job for the day, anywho. Well, that and I gotta go make a tuition payment for my sisters. Can you believe how much money textbooks cost? Freaking sheesh.”

[Pause]

[He cocks his head at you, chewing on his absurdly large meatball sub]

“Yeah? I didn’t know that thrift shop gets a lot of textbooks donated. Thanks, hot stuff, I appreciate it.”

[...?]

“Huh? Course I think you’re hot. You kidding? That dress? BAM! Those eyes? BAM! Those legs? DAMMMMNNN!”

[You can’t help it and laugh with him with the other patrons shoot you both confused looks]

“See that’s what I’m saying! You got that look to you. That… I dunno, peaceful look. Like you’re learning to be comfortable with yourself. Like you’re smart and kind and patient and you’d be real nice to come home to. Wifey material! That’s the phrase!”

[Pause]

[He bellows with laughter and slaps his knees]

“Am I proposing?! Damn damn damn, I might just be…”

[He leans forward, grinning that feral smile and waggling his eyebrows]

“What do you think, gorgeous? I don’t have any more jobs for today but I have a garage where I work on cars. Or smash them with crowbars. Real cathartic, if you were wanting to work off some steam.”

[Pause]

[His grin widens]

“Awesome! Here, lemme see your hand. Gonna plant a big ol’ kiss on the back, cause I’m a gentleman, mmwwwaaahh! This is gonna be a Hell of an afternoon! We can even burn that dumb dress if you want!”

[Pause]

[His expression turns a little bit more sensual]

“Damn, no change of clothes? That’s gonna be real awkward, hehe… Or real fun. Guess we’ll see where the night takes us, hm?”

[To be continued???]

Note: I kind of feel like this NEEDS a continuation but I wanna hear what you guys think