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Hmm… still waiting on that shipment of the laser toes… and those triple jointed elbows were supposed to be here weeks ago… how am I supposed to run a business like this?
(door opens)
Oh um, welcome to my clinic, how may I be of assistance? Cyborg components? Oh you mean the enhancements? Yes of course, we do modifications, upgrades and of course initial implants… which are you in the business for?… actually wait don’t tell me, let me guess… just take a seat there…
Hmm… this arm’s too light to be synthetic… maybe the skin… no… you don’t get that kind of redness on contact with synth skin… I was going to say it was a well-done mod but for natural skin… anyway… hmm perhaps…. Did anyone ever tell you have beautiful eyes?... yes there’s a certain… depth and…. No no never mind these can’t be it… see there’s minute imperfections, the pupil’s not a perfect circle and besides they wouldn’t be watering like… oh right, I should probably let you blink, sorry about that… hmm this is a challenge, nono like I said, let me guess… perhaps the legs… that’s been more popular recently… if I just hit here… ah there we are look, that automatic kick you see, awful bug really but you get what you pay for, cutting costs is really not worth the accessibility- excuse me?... reflex? Oh, right of course, nevermind… of course I have a medical license… I didn’t spend 10 minutes doing an online course for nothing… hmm… perhaps something smaller?
You… don’t have any implants?...Why didn’t you just say so, we could have saved so much time, whole minutes, I’m very busy you know?... I… told you not to… well uh, regardless of who is at fault let’s move on, time is money. What is it you have come in for then? You seem fairly physically fit so is this a cosmetic implant or perhaps a functional improvement to what nature gave you or… uh… tracer removal, I don’t judge of course but I do need to make sure you understand that I take absolutely no responsibility in any conflicts between my patients and the sources of their… unwanted attention, be they saint or sinner it’s no business of mine, I just have to make sure I have that on tape if… well, some of my clients are in trouble with some powerful people and let’s just say they have some quite… aggressive legal teams let me tell you that… now where was I? ah yes. What are you looking to purchase?... what kinds of upgrades do I sell?
Well that is quite the question, usually it would be considered best practice to research this before coming to your appointment but I suppose we need to pad out the runtime somehow… what? No no I didn’t say anything, must have been the wind or something… now where was I? Ah yes, well, we have some fairly simple stuff, flexi-fingers for if you feel the joints in your digits just don’t bend quite enough, it’s rather popular among those doing handiwork… there’s a line of similar upgrades for pretty much any joint you can name but I will warn any changes to the joints in your knees will take some getting used to and I take no legal responsibility for any potential injuries sustained as a result… where was I, ah right yes, we offer extra appendages for if you feel like you just can’t hold enough items at once, the most popular option would obviously be arms that are pretty much identical to the ones you already have, we actually have a special set of moulds so they can more cosely match your natural ones, but if you’re looking for something more… unique we do have some non-human models such as tentacles, legs and wings but again these will take some getting used to. In order to install these we actually graft connection points on your back which we can attach these limbs to, making them easily removable which makes sleeping a lot easier than the earlier models… poor Otto, you walked so we could… sleep.
Anyway we aren’t simply limited to limbs if that’s not your cup of tea, we can make cosmetic alterations using skin grafts and subdermal implants, obviously prices can range with the magnitude of changes we’re making here but regardless it’s a fairly popular option, however I will say this is best in moderation, people have a nasty habit of getting addicted to trying to ‘fix’ themselves using these cosmetics and… well, the results can look a little uncanny, we may spit in the face of whatever creator’s out there with our modifications but damn have we not worked out how they make humans look… human…
We also have some minor quality of life mods, just for the sake of convenience really, such as a Bluetooth chip we can put in your cranium, it’s pretty convenient and allows you to control devices you’re paired with, with just a thought but the connections can get a little… messy so just be a little careful. We wouldn’t want to accidentally start thinking out loud through one of the speakers during a family event or something now would we? In terms of cranial implants we do also offer the streaming package to allow you to stream whatever you want whenever you want straight to your ears and eyeballs. Great for boring occasions such as spring cleaning, waiting rooms or… medical malpractice lawsuits, although I will say it’s best not to engage in this service while performing an action that needs your attention such as driving, I’d rather not have you back here for a… different reason.
And of course, as I previously mentioned, for those who value their… privacy, I offer a tracer removal service. A lot of components come with tracker chips, just to keep track of stock, or some workplaces like to keep track of what their employees like to get up to outside their working hours, but for those who prefer to keep their business to themselves I can open them up and… snag the tracking chip, I can even give you the tracker if you want to trick whoever it is tracing you into thinking you’re somewhere you’re not. I consider it a human rights operation really but corporate doesn’t… share my beliefs.
Anything else? Well… perhaps… if you can… promise me you aren’t wearing a wire under there.
Don’t look so serious, I’m kidding. I already scanned you for one when you came through the door, can’t be too careful. But yes I do offer some… alternative options for those willing to bend the rules in a few places.
Let’s see here, in my… special collection there are some more… potent modifications that would raise the eyebrows of some officials so I like to keep them in the back… metaphorically of course there’s just the surgical table back there of course, but you know what I mean.
Let’s see, eye lashes 1 mm beyond the recommended maximum length, adaptive foot size changers… illegalised after complaints from shoe companies that it was damaging their profits, and uh… universal tv remotes, now don’t give me that look, I’m being serious, we’re talking universal here, it can interface with anything, y’know like those muted tvs they keep in the corners of bars, well, with this mod you’ll be able to do what we’ve all wanted to do and turn the volume up… I sense I’m not impressing you here but think about the possibilities, billboards, the tvs in shop windows, there’s a reason why this stuff’s illegal.
But moving on, did you have any idea what kind of mod you’d like? .... Wonderful, go and lie on the table and I’ll get ready.
Alright… component ready… patient on table… let’s do some surgery… hmm? Anaesthetic? Oh right yes you probably shouldn’t be awake for this should you, my mistake… here, put this over your mouth and nose and count to 10 for me.
(fading out) now what was it they asked for again?
(pause)
(Fading in) ah you’re awake, welcome back to the waking world your new eyes look great if I do say so myself… that… wasn’t the surgery you asked for? Oh dear-
please credit using: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHlqaz-C2ZxRJGp5MVeiBEg
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