Key:

[Background SFX]

(SFX created by the speaker)

{Stage Direction}

*non-spoken context*

~emphasis~

|Author’s Note|

|Script Commissioned by: Anonymous|

|This script is M4F. It could be retooled pretty easily, but it was based on the power dynamic between male and female spiders. Namely their; sizes, dominance, and the female's tendency to murder the males.|

Arachnophobia

[knock on door]

[door opens]

Hey, I’m about to walk over to the party, are you sure you don’t want to come? I bet we could cut some holes in a sheet or something.

*listener comments*

What? My costume? Yeah, I’m an anthropomorphized spider. I saw it in an anime, I think. What about it?

*listener replies*

Oh, your fear of spiders! I totally forgot! Here, let me-

[door closes]

{muffled}

Now, you don’t have to see me. I’m sorry about that, I didn’t think this costume would be accurate enough to trigger anything.

*listener speaks*

I can’t really hear you. Did you say it reminds you of a bad experience? I don’t know what a man-spider hybrid reminds you of, but whatever it is, I don’t want to bring those memories up for you.

\small pause**

Anyway, I’m going to head to the party. I’ll text every hour or so. If you don’t hear from me by midnight, will you call the police or something?

\listener agrees**

Thanks. Have a good night!

*pause*

|The next section is communicated through text messages. I imagined a light beep as a notification, then a small effect on the speaker’s voice to symbolize that this is something they wrote, not something they said. But whatever amount of edits you want will be fine.|

[beep]

I’m at the party safe. No rouge ax murderers tonight. I forgot to ask, but are we still on for brunch tomorrow?

*pause*

[beep]

Some girl just failed a keg stand. She’s getting taken out in a stretcher. I don’t think that killed the mood entirely, but maybe I’ll make a quick eject from the party.

*pause*

[beep]

The moon is really full tonight. We turned off all the lights and got a bonfire going. It’s a pretty cool vibe. Wish you were here!

*pause*

[beep]

Hey, I think I’m a little too drunk to walk all the way home. Can I crash at your place? I’ll just use the spare key, you don’t have to stay up for me.

*pause*

[door opens]

[wood slides]

{tipsy}

What’s… why did you put a chair in front of the door? You didn’t even jam it right to stop someone you goof!

*small pause*

Oh, no response. You’re probably asleep. I should be quiet.

*small pause*

I’ll just crash on the couch. I hope that’s okay.

[body thumps]

*pause*

{half-asleep}

Hey, I didn’t sign up for sleep cuddles.

*small pause*

Come on. The hangover is starting to set in. I don’t have time for your flirty antics.

(grunt of effort)

You’re heavy! Just get off me!

*listener speaks*

Why do you sound like that?

*speaker snaps alert*

Oh my god! What is happening! Why are you bigger! You have too many legs! What is-!

*listener kisses speaker*

(muffled speech)

(gasp)

This is a web! You stuck me in a web! And you’re a spider! And you kissed me?! What kind of sick nightmare is this?

*listener speaks*

I don’t understand what that means, but I don’t like your tone! What do you plan to do with me?!

*listener begins*

Hey, no! Get off me! This is-

(gags)

-this is really gross. You’ve got an exoskeleton! What happened?

*listener explains*

You’re a were-spider? Like were-wolf? That’s not a real thing. This isn’t real. This can’t be happening.

*listener agrees*

Do ~not~ talk like that!

*listener feigns*

You know exactly how you’re talking! All sultry and slow! It’d be really hot but it just feels like you’re going to eat me!

*small pause*

Is this because I’m dressed as a spider? I don’t know how much cognitive function you have left, but you know I’m not a spider, right? This is just a costume, I can take it off.

*listener begins*

Don’t actually take it off! I’m not wearing anything under this! And you are clearly way too aroused to see me naked! Please, just let me go! I’ll walk home, then come back in the morning. When you’re normal, we can talk about this.

*listener speaks*

Please, don’t say it like that. Normally, I’m all for your mild seductress shtick, but you’ve really cranked it up to eleven tonight. I don’t want to do anything to you, or with you, just let me go.

*listener questions*
Why?! Are you hearing yourself right now? For starters, you have spider legs! I can’t ~do it~ with a spider! It’d be gross, and probably Beastiality. Even if I was into that, I know what female spiders do to their mates! I don’t want any part in it!

*listener assures*

Your mouth says you wouldn’t hurt me, but this web says late-night snack. Why don’t you let me go, and we can have a nice, civil, conversation about this?

*listener speaks*

Please don’t call me cute.

*listener doubles down*

(nervous chuckle)

You know, saying, “I could just eat you up” doesn’t feel so fun or playful anymore!

*listener offers*

No, I’ve already said it. I do not want to do anything with you. Not while you’re like this. Please tell me that you’re spider brain still recognizes the basic ideas of consent.

*listener demands*

That is a really sick ultimatum, you know that? Mate or be food? That’s really not fair.

*listener pressures*

Obviously, I don’t want to be food. But I worry that I’m going to be eaten either way!

*listener assures*

I’d love to believe that, but you seem very unsure of your motives tonight! I’ll need a little more than a promise if you want me to feel safe.

*listener teases*

Oh, that just made it so much worse! Please, don’t call me, ~little fly~! It’s not nearly as hot as you might think it is. It’s just scary.

*listener continues*

Baby-talking me does not make me feel any better!

*pause*

{stern}

Hey, if the real you is still in there. Then I ~need~ you to get off me, and free me from this web, right now!

*listener retorts*

No, this isn’t the real you. My best friend isn’t a murder-hungry spider girl. She’s sweet and funny, and not in the least bit menacing! I want to talk to her, not whatever she’s become.

*listener rages*

Woah! Okay! I don’t need any biting or stabbing or anything of that sort! I don’t want to, but I will gladly sacrifice my morals if it means I get to live!

*listener questions*

Yep, I’ll conform! You can have your way with me! Just don’t hurt me!

*listener muses*

No, I’m definitely not trying anything! I just want to survive! And I’ll do whatever that takes.

*listener comments*

Sorry, the adrenaline must be getting to me, I think I misheard you. It sounded like you said beg, but I’ve been begging all night. I’ve been constantly asking for you to let me go!

*listener clarifies*

You want me to beg for you to eat me? That seems counterproductive. I don’t want to be eaten!

*listener demands*

Fine! Fine. I’ll do it, just know, that I don’t mean what I’m about to say. I don’t want you to eat me.

*small pause*

Take a bite. Please, bite into my flesh. I don’t need it. I need you. I want you to eat me. I want to sustain you. You caught me, so I’m yours. You can eat me. Please, eat me. I’m nothing if not a meal. All I am is for you. Eat me.

*small pause*
Was that enough? Please don’t make me keep going, because it really seems like you’re starting to believe the begging. I do ~not~ want to be eaten, I just want to leave.

*listener speaks*

Yes, I’ll say anything to leave, right now. Just name it.

*listener offers*

Okay. I’m yours. I belong to you. Even when the sun rises, I will still be yours. I’m your little fly. You caught me. I’m yours.

*small pause*

So can I go now?

*listener agrees*

Thank you, thank you, thank you. I really thought you were going to go back on this. Please just get me off the web.

*listener removes speaker*

Thank you. I can’t stress that enough.

*small pause*

{panicked}

No, you don’t need to escort me to the door! I can find it on my own! I’ll be back tomorrow! Once the sun is nice and high in the sky! You don’t have to come looking for me! I’m yours!

[door slams]

[muffled running]

​

All use; for any amount of monetary gain is okay. This script's production was commissioned, but it was not privatized. It is entirely open to public consumption, and the commissioner has agreed to that. Any amount of edits is acceptable. Credit SplashiestPig.