Two scripts today

Feminine Listener or Masculine Listener

The only real difference is pronouns. This would be A4A but I can't find a gender-neutral version of "Founder of An Orphanage" that doesn't sound really gloomy.

As a little bonus, I changed a bunch a tiny, inconsequential details across both scripts to give some extra variation.

I usually put the complete text of my script in the post, so I'm forced to choose one version for formatting's sake. I consider the feminine listener to be the canon option, so I'll copy that here.

Key:

[non-verbal sound effect]

(verbal sound effect)

*scripted silence*

{special direction}

Tsund-Fae

[forest ambiance]

[twig snaps]

(snickering)

Oh, they’re gonna…

(muffled laughter)

Just a little farther…

*listener shouts*

No! No one here but us trees! You should just keep walking!

*listener investigates*

You shouldn’t venture off the path! Lots of evil faes roam these woods! You wouldn’t want to get lost!

*listener grabs speaker*

Ah! This isn’t happening. The creature you grabbed is entirely unrelated to any mischievous behaviors you may have noticed. Pay no attention to them and just walk away.

*listener doubts*

Alright, you got me. I painted the giant red X and when you stepped off the path to avoid it, I was going to prank you. I’m sorry, and if you let me go, I’ll be grateful forever and grant you three wishes.

*listener corrects*

I’m not a fae! I’m a genie. And I’ve lost my bottle so I’ve become especially foolish. I can grant your heart’s desire! What do you want? Silk dresses? A fortune? A suitor mayhaps? I can give it to you, just let me go and close your eyes!

*listener doubts*

Really? Not buying that? Well, it was worth a shot. Fine. You caught me for real. I’m a fae, I wanted to play a little joke on you, and now you’ve grabbed me. You know, in my culture, capturing a fae like this is really frowned upon. You’re lucky I’m nice or I’d totally hex you.

*listener corrects*

I could totally hex you right now! I don’t need to know your name to do magic! And I definitely don’t need to trick you into asking for something and then twist it. That’s a myth made up by… by the… elves! Elves hate us fae because we can… climb trees better than them? Yeah, let me go, and I’ll show you!

*listener denies*

Come on, please? You can’t keep me forever! I’ve got a family, I need to get back to them!

*listener questions*

Where do they live? Um… they live in the fae realm! Which is a place that humans can’t go to, or see, and if I told you about it, you wouldn’t be able to understand because… magic? So you should just let me go, and head back on your merry, human way.

*listener questions*

Yep, my family is probably starting to miss me. I’ve been away for quite a while, so I’ve got to hurry home! Home to the fae realm. Where I live.

*listener doubts*

You’re not buying this either, are you?

*listener speaks*

Well, I thought it was pretty convincing. If you weren’t such a freaky expert on faes, then I bet it would have worked! So really, me being stuck here is your fault, and you should let me go!

*listener questions*

I definitely have a place to go! I just didn’t tell you because… it’s so cool! And if I told you you’d want to come with me, but I don’t have a plus one, so I’d have to say no. And then you’d be sad, and you being sad would make me sad. So… don’t ask where I’m going!

*listener offers*

Nope, you definitely couldn’t help me get there. It’s really far and there are a ton of monsters along the way. Like uh…

{queitly}

What monsters are you afraid of?

*listener responds*

Yeah, lots of those! Whatever those are. And they’re really mean and always hungry, and they didn’t get a good night’s sleep yesterday so they’re extra cranky!

*listener suggests*

You could teleport us there? Are you pulling my leg or something? Humans can’t do magic. So either you’re lying, or you’re not human!

*small pause*

Oh my stars, are you not human?

*small pause*

This is a human road, so if you aren’t a human then you really shouldn’t be here. The humans might not be good at much, but they make very sharp stakes and very bright torches! They don’t like it when they see non-humans around! They’re mean like that.

*listener comments*

No, you should really run! And let me go while you’re at it. Because I think I hear a human coming! Quick! They’re right behind you!

*listener doubts*

Come on! How are you not falling for any of this?

*listener answers*

You’ve dealt with fae before? Oh, that sounds ominous. Are you some sort of huntress? A huntress for fae? Are you going to eat me?!

*listener assures*

You run a home for underprivileged Arcane-s? That can’t be true. There’s only one of those around here and it’s run by the scariest, cruelest, most despicable thing around! They say that the headmistress eats babies! And she’s the second cousin of the devil! If she looks at you, you’ll turn to stone, and then she’ll feed the statue to her pet dragon!

*listener questions*

Where did I hear that? Just a rumor going around. A friend of mine once lived there for a bit, and now, they don’t have wings anymore! She cut them off and made a window out of them!

*listener denies*

That most certainly did happen! It’s not like my friend would lie about something like that! They know how many deep, wing-related fears I have! They would never send a letter like that for any reason other than to warn me!

*listener questions*

Yes, my friend is a fairy! What other things can you think of that have clear wings?

*listener continues*

Yeah, green hair, kind lanky, yellow eyes. Say, how are you guessing all this stuff?

*listener comments*
You know them? They can’t be right. They ventured south, stopped at that monster’s home and they’ve never been allowed to leave! There is no way you could have met them, unless…

*small pause*

Oh no. You’re them! You’re going to pluck out my wings and turn me inside out! Please, I don’t want to die! I was just passing through! I’m sorry I tried to prank you, so please just, let me go!

*listener comments*

Yes, you are! You’re a monster! Your skin is colorless! Your eyes are black! And I’ve even heard that you don’t have teeth! You just swallow your prey alive and let them rot inside you!

*listener questions*

No, I guess you don’t look like that right now. But I’m sure this is some trick to lure me back to your den! That’s probably why I haven’t turned to stone either! You’re trying to take me away and you don’t want to lug me all the way there!

*listener asks*

No! I won’t look in your eyes! That’s probably how you entrance victims! I will never do your bidding, monster!

*listener asks*

No, I’m not curious! I’m going to keep my eyes shut forever if I have to! Just, go away! Let me go!

*listener offers*

If I look you in the eyes, you’ll let me go? No, I…

*small pause*

Hmmm…

(whimpers)

Fine. I’ll look for a second!

*small pause*

Wow, you still look normal. Your eyes are really calming. I… I…

*listener questions*

I don’t know why I thought all those awful things about you. I guess when I heard about the wing thing, my imagination kind of got the best of me.

*small pause*

Do you promise that you’ve never pulled any wings of any fae?

*listener confirms*

Okay then. I guess I… I…

*listener asks*

I don’t know what I want to say! Your eyes are making it very hard to think!

*listener offers*

If I look deeper, I’ll find the courage to speak my mind? That’s a pretty cool power. I guess I… I…

*small pause*

{blurted out}

I want to stay with you!

*small pause*

I don’t know why I said that. It’s not true! I don’t want to stay in one home! I like being free, and pulling pranks!

*listener offers*

No, I don’t want to look in your eyes again! It made me feel all fuzzy and weird. And I don’t have anything else to admit to.

*small pause*

Hey! You can’t just move me into your line of vision! That’s not fair!

*listener speaks*

Nope! I’m not going to look! No matter how pretty your eyes are! I’m not gonna!

*listener waits*

Stop it! I can feel you staring at me! That’s a cruel plot!

*listener stares*

No! I’m not going to… I’m not…

{blurted out}

I don’t have anyone! My parents kicked me out so I’m all alone! I miss having a roof over my head! I miss-!

*speaker stops themselves*

Woah, almost spilled my guts there! What I was about to say is entirely unimportant and you should disregard it.

*speaker questions*

Yes, everything else that I said was true. I’m only eighty-one but my parents said that was old enough to make it big on my own. They thought I should be tormenting travelers and bewitching villages by now. But I’m not very good at magic. Or making deals. Or making tricks. Or making food for that matter. So I’ve been staying close to the road, spooking passerby-s the best I can. Sometimes they have food and water and stuff and that’s all I get.

*listener questions*

No, I don’t have to look into your eyes again. I can say the rest on my own. I miss having someone to watch over me. I said my parents got rid of me. But it was mostly my dad. He’s kind of an old-fashioned fae. My mom was always really nurturing, and you kind of remind me of her. I guess I craved that kind of attention more than I realized.

*listener offers*

Is that really on the table? Could I stay with you?

*listener confirms*

Are you sure I wouldn’t be a bother? Are there enough chairs at the dinner table for me to just show up?

*listener assures*

If there’s not you can just magic up some more? Well, if you’re sure that you don’t mind. And you promise that all the other Arcanes won’t be mean to me, then I guess I could stay. For a little while.

*listener expresses*

Hey, uh…

*small pause*

Thank you.

​

([{All use is great! You can monetize, paywall, or just sell audiobooks of it outside your local grocery. Anything is fine! Any amount of editing is perfectly acceptable. Credit SplashiestPig}])