Google Doc with better formatting

All use; paywalled, monetized, or otherwise is okay. Any improvs, sound choices, additions, or omissions, are great. Credit SplashiestPig. And I'd love to see any finished products in the comments.

Key:

[Background SFX]

(SFX created by the speaker)

{Stage Direction}

*non-spoken context*

~emphasis~

|Author’s Note|

Bewitched

[door opens]

{pleasantly surprised}

Hey, you’re here a little early! Couldn’t resist the thought of my lasagna, huh?

*listener speaks*

Yeah, come in. Make yourself at home, it’ll be done in a second.

{loudly}

Tonight’s a new moon. Got any fun spells coming up?

*listener explains*

I don’t really know what that means, but I trust you’ll enjoy it. If it’s a low-tier thing, could I join you for it? Maybe I’ll learn something about magic.

*listener denies*

“Not really a beginner’s thing”. Okay, that’s fine. Would you pick out something to watch? I want to focus on the plating.

{thinking}

That should keep them distracted for a bit. It’s now or never, |name|. Just a little prick to the finger and-

(gasp)

*listener questions*

{outloud}

I’m fine, just touched a hot plate. Be ready in a moment!

{thinking}

The instructions on the bottle are pretty vague. Oh well, here goes nothing. One drop of my blood on the lasagna. Pour some potion over it. Now to get my future partner to ingest it.

*small pause*

Am I sure this is alright, morally? I don’t want them to be forced into loving me.

*small pause*

It’s fine, right? The bottle says it only lasts for a megasecond. That can’t be too long. Hopefully just long enough to make them confess.

*small pause*

I know they like me, I’m just afraid to get shut down. So really, this is just a more complex way of asking them out. Yeah, I’m sure it’s fine.

{outloud}

Okay, the food’s ready!

*time skip*

So did I outdo myself or what?

*listener speaks*

{playfully hurt}

You most certainly have not, “had better”. I don’t care what dimension you source from, my lasagna is the best in the universe.

*listener comments*

I’m sorry if that sounds egotistical, it’s just a definitive fact. Can’t fault me for speaking the truth.

*listener speaks*

{casual}

You’ve got the plates? That sounds great! I’ll go get the snacks for the movie.

(humming to themself)

*listener confronts*

Why whatever could be the problem?

*listener exposes*

“You found one of your potions in my cabinet”? I wonder what that’s all about.

*listener pushes*

Woah, calm down. I’m sure you just left it there one day.

*pause*

“I need to come clean”? Come clean about what?

*listener begs*

“If I don’t tell you the truth something awful might happen”? Like what, you’ll confess your deep-rooted love for me?

*listener speaks*

Yes, okay! I snagged a potion last time I visited. I knew we both like each other and I thought the potion would kickstart a relationship. I had no idea you’d react so vehemently though.

*listener repeats*

Why are you so worried? Maybe you’ll try to kiss me. Perhaps an uncomfortable moment or two, and then this will all smooth over. I don’t see the harm.

*listener laments*

What do you mean, “That’s not how this potion is meant to work”? Is there some fine print on the bottle or something?

*listener explains*

“The potion is for instilling love in something that doesn’t already love you”? That sounds really messed up.

*listener comments*

“It’s for inanimate objects”? Okay, that makes more sense, I still don’t see the problem though. Not like much is going to happen, it’ll be through your system in no time.

*listener questions*

Yeah, a megasecond. So I’m sure we don’t have anything to worry about.

*listener clarifies*

{worried}

“A megasecond is almost twelve days”?! Okay, that’s a little longer than I thought, but in my defense, it had “second” in the name, so I thought it would be fast.

*listener berets*

{happy}

Maybe I’m not taking this entirely seriously, but really, I don’t see the harm. I won’t do anything ~spicy~ until this stuff wears off, so this is nothing but a good icebreaker and a really fun story to tell at a wedding.

*small pause*

Cool, you’re pupils are little pink hearts! That’s a nice touch.

*pause*

The hearts went away. Does that mean something?

*listener speaks*

{serious}

“It means your trying not to love me”? Hey, I understand that this was a little out there and I’m sorry. You’re just so nice, and ~very~ out of my league. I couldn’t muster the courage to ask you out and lose what we had. Even if I practically knew you’d say yes.

*listener clarifies*

“That’s not the problem”. Well then, what is?

*listener explains*

{happy}

“You do love me, even without the potion, and that’s the problem.” Why is that a problem? We can just play it cool for two weeks then start a real relationship.

*listener explains*

Yeah, you already said the potion wasn’t intended for this. Is that going to have a consequence?

*listener speaks*

You’re kind of losing me on the magic mumbo jumbo. Can you dumb it down for me?

*listener explains*

“That potion was like elephant tranquilizer, and I just used it on a sedated deer.” Okay, that certainly does something to paint a picture. So are you going to fall asleep or..?

*listener corrects*

“It’s not a literal tranquilizer.” Got it. So what’s going to happen?

*listener speaks*

“You’re going to love me a lot”? Like lots of cuddles or..?

*listener speaks*

“Obsessive”. Okay, so you’re pretty clingy for a few days, so what?

*listener trails off*

Oh cool, the hearts are back. Will the loving you explain this better than the angry you?

*listener explains*

Yeah, we could explain go somewhere else to talk. Where?

*listener speaks*

{worried}

“My bedroom”?! Okay, that stuff does not play around. Can I get my angry, magic friend back?

*listener ignores*

[magic sfx]

Hey, I’m floating! Are you making me float? Hey, I don’t think the bedroom is such a good idea anymore! Hey! Stop!

*listener snaps out*

[body hits floor]

(groan)

That hurt a little. Are you back?

*listener questions*

{confused}

What do you mean, “What happened?” You just picked me up and started pulling me to the bedroom. Don’t you remember that?

*listener speaks*

“That means it’s getting worse”? Does that imply that this is going to continue to get worse, or is this the max?

*listener asks*

“Were your eyes fully pink?” I don’t know I didn’t get a good look.

*listener speaks*

Okay, so when the hearts cover your vision entirely, that will be the peak of the potion. Alright, I’ll try to keep a lookout for that.

*listener denies*

What do you mean, “It’ll be too late then”? I’ll just keep an eye on you and then I’ll tell the normal you what happened when you come back.

*listener explains*

{distressed}

“When it gets to that point, the normal you won’t come back”? Like forever or just for the twelve days?

*listener clarifies*

{relieved}

“Just until the potion wears off”. That’s good. I was really worried I might have done some real damage.

*listener reverses*

“You might do some real damage”? I don’t understand. Yeah, you were pretty forceful, but if you love me, you’re not going to hurt me, right?

*listener explains*

“I’m not the one in danger”? I don’t understand, are you going to hurt yourself or something?

*listener denies*

Well if neither of us is in danger then we’re fine. No one else is here.

*listener comments*

Yeah, you do magic, where are you going with this?

*listener clarifies*

You can read minds! That’s so cool!

*small pause*

I don’t mean to blame you but, if you can read minds, why didn’t you stop me from doing the potion thing?

*listener specifies*

Oh, normally you don’t because it’s invasive. That’s really thoughtful of you.

*listener asks*

“Did the ~loving~ version of you seem thoughtful?” No, I guess they seemed pretty-!

*speaker realizes*

{nervous}

-Ooh! They’d be willing to do any number of forbidden magics on me, wouldn’t you?

*listener confirms*

Okay, but you still aren’t going to hurt me, so it’s fine. Right?

*listener spells it out*

“What do I think would happen if you got jealous”? I don’t know, probably something awful, but you’ll have no reason to be jealous. We’ll be the only ones here, and I only love you.

*listener questions*

Yeah, I love my family. What’s your-

*speaker realizes*

-oh, would that set you off?

*small pause*

It’s fine, I’ll just turn off my phone and stay out of contact for a bit. No big deal.

*listener explains*

“If I even thought about anyone else, you’d know.” That could be a problem, couldn’t it?

*listener agrees*

Okay, you’ve made it clear. I really messed up. Can we do anything to fix this?

*listener speaks*

{hopeful}

“You could perform a counterspell”? That’s good. So, what are we waiting for?

*listener speaks*

“You need supplies”? Okay, you can just rush home and get some.

*listener disagrees*

“You can’t?” Why not?

*listener explains*

“Being away from me would set you off faster.” Okay, I’ll go with you!

*listener denies*

“Me being around other people would set you off faster.” That’s not good, but we can still do this. Can’t we fly there or teleport or something?

*listener speaks*

“Using magic will set you off faster”. You know, this whole situation seems like a real catch twenty-two.

*pause*

{discouraged}

Is there anything we could do to make this go smoother?

*listener tells*

“You think you could trap yourself away from me”? That sounds like a good plan. Can I help with that or..?

*listener asks*

“We need something to wrap around you.” I think I’ve got some kite string. Would that work?

*listener agrees*

Okay, I’ll just be in the garage. I hope that isn’t too far away.

*pause*

That pentagram looks cool. Is it part of the spell or…

{panicked}

Hey there, my good friend! My friend, who has no further claim on me. My friend who definitely doesn’t need to have their way with me. Are you getting the picture? We’re just friends and nothing more. No matter how alluring your eyes look when they glow like that.

*listener questions*

“Why are you standing in a pentagram”? Oh, you know how it is. The other you just likes drawing pentagrams for no particular reason.

*listener questions*

“Why do I have string”? Just for a project, I’m working on. Nothing special, just totally, mundane, non-magic activities. Of course, it’s a non-magic activity since I don’t know how to do magic. And I definitely am not cooperating with the other you to seal you away.

*small pause*

Speaking of the other you, do you think you could let them back out? I don’t really know the full scope of your relationship, but I just have something to say to them.

(yelp)

Yep, I’m sure I could tell you anything I would tell them. That’s why I can tell you that…

…it’s time for dessert? Dessert! Which is ice cream and… red wine… mixed? Yeah, like a wine milkshake. A wine-shake if you will, I kind of invented it.

*small pause*

If you’ll just excuse me for a moment I can get two, ready.

*listener flirts*

“You want something else for dessert”? Okay, I’m sure we could get you whatever you want. What were you thinking of?

*listener commits*

“Me”?! I’m flattered but I’m not on the menu!

[magic sfx]

Hey, I’m floating again!

*listener comments*

No, there’s nothing we need to do on the couch! We should just stay a healthy distance apart and talk! Please stop floating me!

[body thuds]

{relieved}

Oh, that was close! I was really worried you weren’t coming back for a second!

*listener questions*

Yeah, the hearts had covered all the color in your eyes. But we still had some space left near the edges.

*listener asks*

Yeah, I got the string. Is it going to be enough?

*listener comments*

I hope so too. So how does this work?

[magic sfx]

Cool, you made the string glow. Now what?

*listener speaks*

“You need me to tie you up with it”? Okay, should I take my time or do I need to hurry?

*listener clarifies*

Yeah, I imagine doing this spell probably didn’t help our little problem. I’ll try to tie you up quickly.

[magic sfx]

There, you’re all tied up. Do we have any time before-!

{nervous}

Oh, you're back! Not back, because you never left and there is certainly no one else here.

*listener questions*

Please don’t call me darling. And as for why you’re tied up, it’s because… we’re trying out some bondage stuff?

*listener reveals*

“You know that’s not true”? Worth a shot though, right?

(dry chuckle)

*listener begs*

I’m not your sweetheart, and I can’t untie you! You’re not stable right now. So you need to stay right there, away from me, until you calm down.

*listener states*

I’m sure you feel calm, but you’re eyes are very pink right now. And I don’t want you exacting revenge on anyone for looking at me funny.

*listener questions*

Nope! There’s no one looking at me! I’m such a loser that I have no friends and all of my family disowned me so there is no one you need to think about!

*listener disagrees*

Wow, mind reading is inconvenient. Okay, how about I put it this way. If you hurt the people I love platonically. I will never love you romantically.

*listener threatens*

“You can make me love you?” Probably true, but that’s not necessary! If you stay in your pentagram I’ll stay with you all the time! I’ll feed you and care for you, and I’ll have eyes for no one else. So you do not need to make any attempts at escape because I already love you.

*listener accuses*

Nope, I’m not lying! I only have feelings for you. No one else!

*listener specifies*

“The other you”? No, I don’t love them! I like you way more!

*listener accuses*

Okay, I guess you know I’m lying. But that’s just because you scare me. You’re really intense.

*listener alleges*

They aren’t going to steal me from you. They are you. It’s fine. You can just stay here and then we will be together forever.

*listener agrees*

You agree? You agree. That’s a relief! So I’ll go get monopoly or something and we can get ready for a little vacation-!

*small pause*

You’re not in the string! How’d you get out of the string!

*listener answers*

“I tied it too tight”? That was a possibility?! You know, if I had known that I could tie it too tight I would have-!

*listener approaches*

{scared}

Wow, you are very close! Please don’t hurt anyone.

*listener implies*

“You won’t need to”? I don’t understand but I’m glad you agree!

[magic sfx]

Woah, that knife seems sharp for someone who doesn't plan to hurt people! You know you don’t need it right. I already love you!

*listener foreshadows*

“Not enough”? I don’t get it. What are you-?

*small pause*

You’ve got the love potion. That’s not good. You know you don’t need to use that, right?

[knife cuts]

Hey, I really don’t like that look in your eyes! Please just calm down-!

(drinking sounds)

Oh, that’s not good! You’ve gone and infected me with love! At least I have a few minutes before I go bonkers.

*listener speaks*

“Let’s speed that up”? What do you mean, speed it up? You can’t-!

[magic sfx]

(deep breaths)

*pause*

{desperate}

Kiss me!

(kissing sfx fade to black)