Not gender specific ☺👍

I took a chance and still wrote this script despite not having an experience with owning a cat. Hopefully the nekos will be happy with my effort 😂

Legends :

° (y/n etc ) listeners action/your action/sfx that I think will work.

P.S

YOU CAN ADD MEOW/PURRING SFX IN WHATEVER PART OF THE SCRIPT YOU WANT IT TO BE IN BUT I SUGGEST YOU INCLUDE IT BEFORE OR AFTER YOUR NEKO TALKS BUT DON'T OVER DO IT ( you can over do it too if you want 😅 all caps because some might missed this important sfx )

Setting : You are a sneaky little kitty that is trying to get your paws on the hidden stash of catnip your Master hid from you. Home setting.

Script BELOW ⬇

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(Snoring sfx)

Looks like Master is sleeping like a log in the bedroom. I could hear Master's strange loud growls even from here. Finally, the coast is clear. I think this is the purrfect time to wander around and look for those magical flakes that Master forbid me to get my paw's on without supurrvision (supervision) and purrmission (permission)

The other day, as Master thought I was already asleep, Master sneakily hid the magical flakes on the top counter in the kitchen. Good thing I am as sneaky as my Master. My eyes were slightly peering through my lids as I was lying on the sofa.

Time to sashay my way into the kitchen since there's no one around to stop me from doing my clawver (clever) plan.

( pitter patter steps sfx, take your time with this sfx)

It's over there. I can already smell it. I just have to jump up the counter to get to it. It's time to use my cathletic (athletic) abilities. Let me do a countdown first, in one, two, three... (thud on wood counter sfx) I feel pawsome (awesome) I could be a pawlympic (olympic) gold medalist with that jump . If Master saw me do that leap, my Master will be proud.

Ooh, my pink buttoned nose is already tingling with excitement as the scent of the magical flakes draws near. There it is! Oh my. Master is more clawver (clever) than I have thought. The magical flakes are enclosed inside a plastic container. Let me think. I have an idea, what if I "accidentally" knocked it over the counter? yes, yes... there is a purrbability (probability) that Master will believe it.

Here goes nothing... oops I booped it with my nose by accident.

(Thud on carpet floor sfx)

Nya nya nya... furtunately (fortunately) the plastic container hit the carpeted floor with a low thud. The cap that covers it also broke loose which caused the magical flakes to scatter all over.

Its time to get this kitty purrty (party) started but first I have to get down of here (thud on carpet sfx)

Sniff, sniff, sniff (sniff sfx)... I'm feeling its magical pawers (powers) already. I feel light and airy like those little ladybugs and colorful butterflies that I play around with outside at Masters garden. I am definitely feline (feeling) good.

The floor is feline happy too, it is dancing in all directions that is making me woozy, might as well lie down to keep myself steady and roll over it just fur (for) fun, whee... whee...

(Phone alarm ringing sfx)

Oh no! that odd shaped brick that Master always hold on to is screaming! It's going to wake up Master from deep slumber. ( stop alarm sfx) Oh oh it stopped! that only means...

(Footsteps on carpet sfx, take your time with this sfx) I am hearing footsteps coming this way! what to do? what to do?!

(y/n morning groan sfx) Master is half asleep and is trying to process everything that is currently displayed on sight. Master looks furry (very) angry seeing all the mess I have created. This leaves me with no choice, I have to stand my ground and be as furmidable (formidable) as pawsible (possible) and the only way to show that is thru a... staring contest! Master is not that good at staring for longer periods, this will be a sure victory for me stare stare stare stare

(y/n mumble sfx) What did I do? nothing Master all of this is just a...a... hallucination (y/n mumble sfx ) Bad kitty? Master just called me a bad kitty, I feel pawful for making Master clean up the mess but its always been this way since I was a teenie weenie kitten. Sometimes I wonder... if Master is really the master of this house, then why does my Master always cleans up after my mess? is it because I am the Master fur real (for real)? or maybe this is just a wishful thinking of mine nya nya nya.

I will apawlogize (apologize) later by bringing Master a fresh new kill once I return from my hunting escapade this afternoon. Master always does this "happy dance" every time I bring a purresent (present), jumping around screaming and doing weird arm movements. It must be the effect of seeing the warm, juicy and plump dead rats that I always leave at the doorstep.

(dragging something sfx and vacuum sfx) Master is bringing out the "big guy", the long snout creature is sucking up the magical flakes off the floor. Master is distracted, purrhaps (perhaps) this is my chance to retreat to my secret hideout. Master might whisker me away and place me in time out inside my carrier if I get caught, like pawlice do to criminals because that is what clawenforcement (law enforcement) is all about.

(pitter patter steps sfx, take your time with this sfx)

I'll be safe inside this hideout. It looks quite small but I can squeeze my glamorpuss (glamorous) body inside squeeze squeeze (squeeze inside box sfx) oof! there I'm all settled in, I'll stay in here for awhile and let the magical pawers (powers) of the flakes subside. At this meowment (moment) I am seeing 3 little mice running around above my head nya nya nya must be because I only took 3 sniffs. I should have sniffed like there's no tomorrow, it makes me hissterical (hysterical) just thinking about having dozens of mice running above my head nya nya nya.

(Footsteps nearing sfx)

What's this?! (Reaching inside box sfx)... Master is pulling me out of my box. Are you kitten me?! (kdding me) this was supposed to be a top secret hideout of mine. Master pawlease (please)... let us just move furward (forward) and furget (forget) that this ever happened. I won't do it again, I pawromise (promise). (footsteps on carpet sfx, take your time with this sfx) Master is taking me back into the living room, I guess this is one of those purrental (parental) talks again and Master will be lecturing me about my cattitude pawroblems (attitude problems).

(Footsteps on carpet sfx and sitting on couch sfx)

(y/n mumble sfx) Master told me not to do it again coz if I do, Master will take away my fish toy and my favorite feather teaser wand. I cannot let that happen of course, so I pawromised (promised) and Master is always quick to furgive (forgive) me every time. Having this kind of furriendship (friendship) with my Master is something that I will always treasure furever (forever).

The End