[startled] Me? You… you really want to go with me? Me?

You chose me pretty quickly… surprisingly quickly… n-not that there’s anything bad about that!

That just means that everything is settled quickly!

[holding back excitement] And… Well, um, thank you!

Don’t worry, I’ve been coming to the Monster Ball for years now – I know everything you could know about it! The good and the bad, if anyone knows about it, it’s me! …N-Not that I’m bragging or anything, just letting you know… (nervous laughter)

[Zoe takes a deep breath to calm herself]

What I’m saying is - I’m going to make sure you have a great first time at the Monster Ball! I promise.

[mumbles] If I do this right, you’ll have good memories of tonight… and maybe you’ll want to spend some time with me when the Ball’s over, too…

Though… I haven’t gone to the Monster Ball with a date before… but it should still be fine, right? …W-Wait, I’m actually on a date right now. Oh. My. Cthulu- I’m on a date right now.

I never even went on a date while I was still human. Well, that should just mean that I’m more equipped to be the human’s date, right?

It wasn’t that long ago that I was turned, so I should still know a lot about the human world, even… even if I haven’t been *in* the human world for a while… did the second iPhone come out yet?

***

[normal volume] H-Huh? Oh, sorry, I was just… just thinking out loud about what we should do first.

You arrived at the Ball quite late. Have you had the chance to eat yet?

***

You haven’t? Then, let’s go downstairs to where all the food is.

Sadly I don’t think there’s much left… monsters get quite hungry. But there should still be a decent selection!

Since there are so many different monster races that attend the Monster’s Ball, which means there’s always going to be a large range of different foods to accommodate each monster’s dietary requirements.

I’m sure there’ll be at least one thing that you like there!

***

Huh? Oh, yeah, the crowd is really big… what’s wrong? Are you worried about being around so many monsters?

Don’t worry, we’re not as vicious as Hollywood movies make us seem. …Not that there aren’t some monsters who act like you see their race act in movies – but they’re just the unfortunate minority that humans remember rather than how peaceful the rest of us are.

I learned that pretty quickly after becoming a monster myself. It’s why I’m not all… ‘I will eat your brains!’ (laughs)

…N-Not that there’s anything wrong with your brains! You’re super sweet, so I’m sure your brains are sweet and tasty too!

[Zoe makes a noise like a balloon deflating as she realises how bad that sounds]

…I promise I’m not going to eat your brains. You’re my date, after all…

[reassuring] What I’m trying to say is, no one here is going to do anything bad to you, even in a big crowd. Everyone here is a respectable monster – well, most are respectable monsters – and we’re all just here to have a good time. Okay?

***

…You weren’t worried about the crowd of monsters?

[mumbles, embarrassed] So I just embarrassed myself by going on a long tangent for nothing…?

[normal volume] S-Sorry, I jumped to conclusions.

I suppose you were just pointing out the crowd to make conversation… I should’ve picked up on that.

***

You weren’t just pointing it out either? Then why…?

***

You were worried we might get separated?

I suppose that could happen. The only way to get downstairs to the food is on the other side of the crowd, though…

***

[flustered] Hold… hands?

We definitely wouldn’t lose each other that way, you’re right…

S-Sure! I’m not against it.

Can you hold this hand? My other arm is still loose from the Twister battle with the octopus girl.

[Zoe and listener hold hands]

[nervous] My hand doesn’t feel too bad, does it?

I try to use moisturiser, but my skin is still rotting flesh… I hope it doesn’t feel too gross.

***

[Zoe squeals]

You k-kissed the back of my hand…!?

Y-You could’ve just said that you didn’t mind, you didn’t have to go that far… n-not that I’m complaining or anything!

That was a really… n-nice… gesture…

Sorry, I feel a little dizzy… is this what they mean when they say about your blood rushing to your head? I don’t have any blood, though…

N-Never mind. Let’s go downstairs.

[the two walk downstairs]

Looks like there aren’t that many people here anymore… I guess everyone has gone upstairs to dance.

At least that means no crowd around all the food. You get to have your own pick of everything! …That’s left…

***

What do I recommend?

[excited]I really love the brain jellies… they’re made with real brains! …N-Not human brains though, don’t worry.

But I’m guessing that’s not something you’d enjoy…

[mumbles] What do humans like again…? They like brownies, right? Wait, no, I gave the last of them to Vicky…

The cupcakes? No, the only ones left are red velvet, and those were made with real blood.

Even the drinks are made with ingredients sourced from the home of the sirens… who knows what would happen if they consumed those.

[normal volume] …Sorry. I’m not really sure what you’d enjoy from the buffet.

I-I’m sure there’s still at least something-

[Zoe makes a startled noise]

I-I wasn’t expecting to see a brain jelly so close to my face.

…Why are you holding it so close to my face?

***

To eat…?

***

Because I sounded so excited… you wanted to get some for me?

[shy/flustered] Oh… is… is that so?

Thank you, that’s really kind of you.

Um…

***

[Zoe makes a startled/flustered noise]

Feed me!? Y-You want to…!?

A-Are you sure? I-I’m not against it – honestly, you just suggesting that made me unbelievably happy – but you promise you’re not just forcing yourself to say that because… because of something?

***

You’re not? Really?

***

You’re really not… oh.

[flustered] T-Then, if you don’t mind…

[Zoe eats the brain jelly from the listener’s hand]

Oh…! So good!

This one tastes even better than the ones I had before somehow!

***

You have more? Oh, yes, please!

[Zoe eats some more brain jellies from the listener’s hand]

I could live on brain jellies alone, I’m not joking…

…H-Hang on a second! We came down here to find food for you, not me!

[mumbles] I can’t believe I let myself get distracted by brain jellies…! Even if they were the ones feeding me, I’m supposed to be the one in charge of this date… c’mon, Zoe, get it together!

[normal volume] Since… since you can’t find any food you like, why don’t we go do something else instead?

How about… dancing! This is a ball, after all. Why go to a ball if you don’t plan on dancing? …Even if you’re not the best at it like me.

How does that sound? Are you okay with hitting the dance floor?

***

Great! …Um, if you want to, we can hold hands again. …So we don’t get lost!

[Zoe and listener hold hands]

T-Thank you.

[the two walk upstairs]

Looks like the crowd isn’t as bad as it was earlier… more room for us to dance.

Have you ever danced at a ball before?

I haven’t ever been to a human ball, but I imagine dancing at a human ball isn’t too different from dancing at the Monster’s Ball.

Right now, it looks like…

[flustered] I didn’t realise they were doing s-slow dances right now…

[mumbling] I mean, if we’re each other’s date, it should still be fine, right? These kinds of dances are made for people who are out on a date, right?

[normal volume] Do… Do you still want to dance? I can completely understand if not!

***

[happy/relieved] You do? That’s… that’s great!

[the two walk onto the dance floor]

For these kinds of dances, my hand should go here, if I’m remembering correctly… sorry, I've never had the chance to do this kind of dance before. I’ve always been on the sides watching c-couples…

Let’s hope I’m naturally good at this so we don’t end up tripping over each other’s feet. (nervously laughs)

[the pair start dancing]

[whispers] I hope I’m not too bad of a dance partner... you’re better at this than I thought you’d be. N-Not that I thought you’d be bad at this or anything like that…

[still whispering, jokingly] Are you sure you don’t take classes?

Now I feel like I have to be extra careful not to mess up or-

[Zoe shrieks as they both fall]

[normal volume] I-I’m so sorry!! My leg… I knew my arm was loose, but I didn’t think my leg would fall off like that!

I’m sorry, this must seem so gross to you right now, I…

[Zoe makes a startled/flustered noise; listener pulls them off the dance floor]

Thank you for helping me off the dance floor… you surprised me when you suddenly grabbed me like that.

***

I forgot to bring my sewing kit, but I should still have some duct tape left in my clutch… it should do for now.

I don’t think I’m going to be able to dance anymore though… you can go ahead and leave me here if you want. Or maybe someone from earlier is available to take over from me as your date…

***

I’m the only date you want, so you’ll stay here and sit with me?

Y-You… you really are a lot bolder than I thought you’d be… I’m getting that weird blood-rushing feeling again. (nervously laughs)

…Are you enjoying the Monster’s Ball so far?

I know it’s probably been a bit hectic for you… everyone was arguing with each other for a chance to get your attention, then my leg just fell off, plus I’ve probably been worrying you with how much I’ve been talking to myself… it’s a bit hard for zombies to think, so we have to talk out loud to get our thoughts straight.

It’s where the groaning stereotype comes from – we’re just constantly mumbling to ourselves.

Thank you for putting up with me even with that. (laughs)

***

You have had a good time, even with all that? Phew…

I told you; the Monster Ball is a wonderful place to be! The perfect place to have fun… and now we know that’s true whether you’re a monster or a human!

***

You’ve had a good time… because you got to go with me?

[flustered] I-I… ah, I didn’t expect you to be so forward.

[whispers] …M-Me too. Being your date to the Monster’s Ball has been… better than I could’ve imagined.

[Zoe and the listener kiss]

It might be a little early to ask… but can you be my date for next year’s Monster Ball, too?