Context: You were just looking for something new. Something exciting to discover. For you, that might mean a day out, but the universe has other plans. A mysterious, massive box was just dropped off at your house with a tag that reads, 'Himbo Mystery Box'.

Setting: Home

Tags:[MM4A][Strangers to Lovers?][Android Himbo Speakers][Confused Listener][Mystery Box][Himbos][Jealous][Protective/Possessive][Flirting][Flexing][Fighting Over Listener][Script Challenge][CW: Arguing]

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[AJ] = The cuddle bug Himbo, professional shit-starter

[R] = Rory, potentially British

[Scene opens in your home]

[SFX: The doorbell/door being opened]

[Feel free to fill-in the delivery being made here in your own way. Rec. [Pause]/SFX: A pulley and two large thunks as the boxes are dropped off]

[You answer the door to a delivery person with a large box on the pulley. They wheel it inside, much to your confusion, then go back to their truck while you read the tag on the box]

[...?]

[SFX: Another subtle thunk while the Listener parses reality]

[You read the tag again, confused]

[Note: Feel free to read this in either Himbo’s voice:]

Hi! You don’t know me yet, but I am your Himbo! What kind of Himbo am I? That is for you to discover! We come in over forty different combos and variants, so there’s no telling what you’ll get! What is for certain is that I’ll love you and treat you with a heart of gold. So… Will you open me, please?

[...]

[It occurs to you that, even if this is some prank, there could be a living person in the box desperately low on air]

[Pause!!]

[SFX: Frantic package opening]

[As you hurriedly open the box, there is, indeed, a man inside. He’s… well, very Himbo, for sure. He gives you a boyish smile]

[AJ] “Hi.”

[Pause?!]

[AJ] “Why would I not be OK??”

[Pause…]

[AJ] “Oh. Ha! Forgot air holes again, did they? Hehe… Silly shipping department.”

[...Pause?]

[He nods, stepping out with a big stretch]

[AJ] “Mmhm, I’m good. Thank you for opening me… I’m Model A-J1R3 but most people just call me ‘AJ’... Man, I feel like I skipped ALL of the leg days…”

[Pause?]

[AJ] “I mean… I don’t feel the same way you would. My legs aren’t actually sitting there, screaming, ‘BRO, YOUR STRETCHES!’, but my programming lets me experience a similar function so that I’m more authentic.”

[...Pause?]

[AJ] “Haha, I can simulate eating food. I can simulate a heartbeat, tears, and many other things.”

[...?]

[He laughs]

[AJ] “It’s not rude to ask me questions, no… I mean, to be frank, usually people just unwrap us and go, ‘Chop chop, muscle boy’, hehe. It’s nice to have an owner curious enough to ask… You wanna feel my muscles?”

[Pause…]

[He flexes for you. The company knows what they’re doing with the thin, sheer shirt he’s wearing]

[...]

[AJ] “Haha… Someone likes what they see.”

[Pause!!]

[AJ] “Hehe, why so upset? I can make ‘em dance if you want, just-”.

[PAUSE]

[He smiles, seemingly chill]

[AJ] “Fine, fine… What kind of ‘variant’ am I? Well, my line is designated as the ‘cuddle bug’ variety with a mix of ‘chill delinquent’. I’m the type you have around to stand up to a bad MIL, always have your back, and that makes sure you’re resting. On the flip side, I do have a high tease quotient to fill, I don’t always think before I speak, and I’m highly likely to bring home orphaned animals.”

[...]

[AJ] “Who gifted me to you?”

[He shrugs, unbothered]

[AJ] “Dunno.”

[...Pause?]

[AJ] “...Why wouldn’t I be OK with this? I mean… It’s what they make us for. I think it’s nice. Your second box might disagree, depending on what he is… Or she, or they, I don’t judge.”

[...]

[You hadn’t noticed it but there is, in fact, another box standing in the corner]

[Pause!!]

[SFX: More frantic box opening]

[AJ stands and watches you open the box, head cocked. The moment he sees who is inside, he makes a curious, almost aggressive hum]

[AJ] “...Huh. That’s a really, really rare model. So rare that they always ship him out without the ability to manually turn himself on. Phrasing, pause, I get the word play. He’s gonna be upsetti spaghetti when he wakes up… Probably British as well.”

[Pause…?]

[AJ] “No, he’s meant to be done up like a weird mix between an anime fighter and a biker. He’s one of the R0-R3s aka the ‘fight the world for you’ Himbo. Easily confused, Labrador energy, always looking for a fight to impress you. But, also, temperamental, sometimes bratty, and easily jealous. Research and Development called him the ‘bruiser with a heart of gold’...”

[Pause?]

[AJ] “Me? I just think they’re asses. ‘Chav’ I think is what the Brits would call him…”

[Pause…?]

[AJ] “Is he dangerous? Mmh, no. None of us are unless absolutely, unavoidably necessary. Like, not just ‘square up’, bro. I’m talking slow motion walk with an explosion in the background serious. He’ll just be protective and obnoxious but, maybe, in British. They were testing other variants… I think.”

[...]

[AJ] “You could send him back, you know…”

[Pause???]

[AJ sighs]

[AJ] “I cannot lie to you… Yes, it would more than likely make him sad or cause rejection stress. We’re not human, but we still have emotions and needs. Like, right now, I’m feeling jealous that you’re not paying attention to me…”

[Pause…]

[AJ] “...No, you’re right. I can see you’re overwhelmed… Sorry.”

[...]

[Again, AJ sighs]

[AJ] “...If you want to keep us both, I can’t stop you…”

[Pause…?]

[AJ] “Bribery, huh? You really think you can bribe me into getting along with him?”

[Pause?]

[AJ] “...Letting me have a spare room for weightlifting is definitely seduction talk, Master. Buuut go on…”

[Pause]

[AJ] “...If I get to cuddle up in your bed, then I’ll be nice to the chili-headed jerk…”

[Pause…]

[AJ tosses you a cute pout]

[AJ] “Do we really have to turn him on? We could use him as a really muscular coat rack!”

[Pause.]

[AJ] “Fiiiine. The switch is under his right ear. I think his model usually goes by “Rory” or something just as dumb…”

[Pause?]

[AJ smiles at you innocently]

[AJ] “Wh-? Me, being mean and jealous? Dude, I am so chill! Look at his muscles compared to mine! Like he’s even a threat.”

[...?]

[AJ pouts, some of the wind knocked out of him]

[AJ] “...Bringing up that he’s slightly taller than me is a low blow, bro. Er, I mean, Master.”

[Pause?]

[AJ] “Rackum frackum… Fine. I’ll actually behave this time, sheesh.”

[Pause]

[SFX: The switch being clicked/’Rory’ starting to power up]

[R] Hi! I’m your personal Himbo, R0-R3-159 but most call me ‘Rory’-

[AJ scoffs]

[AJ] “Unoriginal.”

[R] -I am a protective variant that loves to fight to protect my Master-.

[AJ] “Booooo.”

[Pause!]

[AJ] “I’m being nice!”

[R] ...I look forward to being able to serve you.

[AJ opens his mouth but quickly shuts it as you side-eye him. You think you hear a tiny ‘simp’ in the cough he fakes]

[Pause]

[Rory, you presume, steps out of his box, rubbing his very glam rock head]

[R] “So… You’re my Master?”

[Pause?]

[He grins maliciously the second you confirm yes]

[R] “Brilliant.”

[SFX: Knuckles being cracked]

[R] “Let’s go, ‘Cuddle Bug’, outside!”

[AJ, unimpressed] “Oh no, innit bruv?”

[R, confused] “What are you-?? WHATEVER! I heard you talking shit the whole time I was in there! You wanted Master to get rid of me!”

[Pause]

[AJ] “Bro, I let the intrusive thoughts win! C’mon, I said I was sorry!”

[R] “NO YOU DIDN’T?!”

[Pause.]

[AJ] “I… Oh, shit, I didn’t… My bad, bro. Legit. Shake on it?”

[AJ extends a hand to shake. Rory glares at him but takes it. They stare each other down, clearly seeing who’ll give first]

[R] “Nice firm handshake you got there…”

[AJ] “Likewise… Kind of seems like your muscles are giving up though, bro.”

[Rory glares, squeezes and you see AJ nearly buckle]

[AJ] “JESUS, ow! The grip!”

[R] “Oh, I am going to make you so sad you got delivered to the same house… But, for you, Master, I promise I’ll be so good that you won’t even miss him!”

[Pause!]

[They both stop, staring at you like confused puppies]

[AJ] “We’re stopping…”

[R] “Do you… want us to flex?”

[...]

[It’s going to be a long day]

[SFX: Fade out AJ and Rory grumbling at each other in the background]

[To be continued?]

—----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Note: I like to imagine that the company that makes these boys gave some variants natural beef with one another, purely for comedy. Cuddle bug delinquent versus ballistic delinquent makes sense XD

Second note: The funniest thing is that Rory’s line of variants almost always come with a Jersey or Bronx accent to sell him being a ‘thug’, so AJ making fun of him for being a Brit is either wildly out of pocket or this is the one variant that got the Cockney treatment.

Third note: I might do something with female variants, idk XD It feels like every time I do F4 whatever, it turns out poorly.