After confronting a barista off their shift who’s been staring at you from across the cafe, they reveal that they are the God of Love, Cupid, and they ask you a few questions about what love means to a simple human. (~1100 words)

Somehow inspired by Taylor Swift's Blank Space, the misheard lyric "got a long list of Starbucks lovers…" during a class free-write and snowballed. Also the fact I’m aromantic and asexual (aegoromantic/sexual) and my special interest is romance. (Do people actually read these notes?) What is love? Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more.

Also, this a reminder that my commissions are 30% off on my Kofi using the code THANKYOU

Important Notes: Feel free to change or make additions to small aspects of this work such as the tags, pronouns, title, etc.! VA goes by CUPID and the listener is LISTENER. LISTENER responses are “...”

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Here’s my Script List and finally the script: Don't You Ever Grow Bored Of Romance, Lowly Human? Whew, that was a lot, hope you enjoy!

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FADE IN

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INT. QUIET DAY AT A COZY CAFE- MIDDAY.

Scribbling away in a notebook in their own little world, CUPID sits alone at a table. The LISTENER grows curious about what they are doing and approaches them with a friendly smile, asking if they are drawing something.

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CUPID

H-huh? No, they aren’t drawings.

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[...]

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CUPID

Well, I was… journaling. It’s private.

(coldly)

Why are you talking to me anyway? I’m off my shift, you have no reason to.

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[...]

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CUPID

(flustered)

Huh?! I was not staring! I glance around the room a lot to collect my thoughts… for journaling. So I wasn’t specifically staring at you. Look- I wasn’t trying to be weird or anything…

(pause, normal)

Actually… if you’re this curious, why don’t you have a seat and I’ll just show you?

​

The listener sits down in a seat across from them.

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CUPID (CONT’D)

Take a look.

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[...]

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CUPID

Correct, all names. But not just names. Caitlyn x Violet. Sebastian x Abigail x Samson. They are names, people, paired together.

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[...]

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CUPID

Excuse me?! No, I’m not “shipping” people! Here, look. I’ll write down Michael, the boy over there with the freckles and dark curly hair, see him? He’s been eyeballing the one named Arthur, the one with pastel rose gold hair and glasses. They sneak glimpses at one another but somehow never make eye contact.

(annoyed groaning)

This has been going on for an agonizing two weeks.

(normal)

Now, I’ll write their names together and place an “x” between their names.

(confident, smug)

Now in three, two, one… there they go. Michael finally has the guts to talk to him and is now walking over and Arthur miraculously stands up to speak with him as well.

(normal)

I work as a barista and collect everyone’s names, then I set out to do what I do best.

(pause, annoyed)

Don’t you get it? Let me spell it out to you, I’m Cupid, your God(dess) of Love.

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[...]

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CUPID

(mockingly)

You’re right! I have absolutely no need nor reason to bestow my secrets to you, but guess what?

(cold)

It’s because I’m bored, you lowly human.

(smug)

And besides, no one. Will. Ever. Believe you~.

(normal)

And don’t get any ideas, my pen and notebook aren’t magical whatsoever. As long as I’m the one writing their names together then it will come true. And I don’t make them fall in love or whatever, I just give them the nudge to set out what they want, I can’t promise they will be together forever, breakups happen and you live and learn, and yada yada.

(serious)

But I wanted to take this chance to ask you something. Don’t you ever grow bored of romance, lowly human?

(pause, normal)

Let me elaborate. It’s the same thing over and over. Meeting one another, pining, confession, etc. Sure, throw in some angst and backstory and call it your own… but in the end, it’s all the same thing, isn’t it? I’m intrigued to hear your answer. Aren’t you bored of love?

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[...]

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CUPID

(smug)

Oh really? What a romantic outlook on life itself. But it’d only make sense since you humans have such a short lifespan, you can only love so much after all.

(uninterested)

I’ve seen it all in infinite structures and storylines, and I’ll be honest, it’s grown bland to me.

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[...]

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CUPID

Tch, you think I can just drop my position whenever I want or something? It’s not like I can hand my job as a God(dess) to someone else. I pay this world a visit every now and then. I’ll stay a few days, maybe a month, and then find entertainment elsewhere. Here’s another question. What does love mean to you, what purpose do you believe it serves?

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[...]

The listener rambles passionately and Cupid gives small “mhmms” as they listen.

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CUPID

I see. Do you really believe that despite the ups and downs, it's all worth it in the end? Does it not grow tiring or boring?

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[...]

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CUPID

(repeating the listener’s words, thinking out loud)

“Feelings… can never grow boring,” huh? I…

(snapping out of their trance)

Hmmph. I didn’t think I’d spend my day being lectured by some human.

(softly)

But… I just haven’t thought about it that way in a long time. What does… love feel like to you?

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[...]

More rambles.

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CUPID

I see. I’m so used to the skeleton structure of every love story that I guess I’ve… become too focused on the whole confession climax, so much that… I forgot that there’s actual love in love, love to love.

(after a sigh)

Look, I was staring at you because I was figuring out who to pair you with. A name wasn’t coming to mind. People have soulmates, of course, numerous ones, in fact. They vary between platonic or romantic and such. And sometimes fate can change and your soulmate can too to adjust to the pursued choices you make in your life. But your romantic soulmate wasn’t registered at all.

(chuckling)

It’d be a shame if such a firm believer in romance had no one to be with.

(normal)

It’d be cruel to leave you with that information, so instead, think of it this way.

(genuinely)

Your fate lies in your own hands, whether romantic or pursuing your goals.

(normal)

I can still help you with a nudge, the first step in inciting a romance. So feel free to choose anyone here and I’ll scribble your names down.

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[...]

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CUPID

(chuckling)

Curious, aren’t you? Oh please, my dating life is nonexistent.

(normal)

I’ve been infatuated with a human every now and then but nothing too serious. Let’s not focus on that now.

(teasing)

Don’t be shy, tell me who piques your interest.

(normal)

Of course, you don’t have to make up your mind right now-

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[...]

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CUPID

You… you’re joking. But I was cold to you and I called you a “lowly human.” How did that intrigue you?!

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[...]

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CUPID

(flustered)

D-don’t start calling me those sorts of things. I’m a God(dess). I don’t react to such compliments. You’re the cute one with your hopeless romantic attitude and optimism!

(normal)

But you’re right, to be fair, we did jump into a deep discussion right away. And… I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t interested in you too. Heh, I’ve been writing other’s romantic stories for so long, and yet I didn’t realize the clues of my own.

(shyly)

Well… I’d like to be with you if that’s what you want too.

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[...]

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CUPID

Then for once… I’d like to go without the paper and pen and try something new… as long as it’s with you.

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FADE OUT

Thank you for reading/ considering using my work!

╭( ･ㅂ･)