*** = listener speaking

Can be monetised, just please link back to either this post or my YouTube!

Gender(s) can be changed if wanted!

~~~

[speaker knocks on door]

Hello? Is someone in there?

…Are you alright, hun? I thought I heard you crying.

Can I come in?

[moment of silence before listener opens the door]

Excuse me… oh, there’s more room in the supply closet than I thought.

Oh dear, you have been crying! Here, I always keep tissues on me.

No, no, it’s alright. I insist – this is what tissues were invented for, after all!

Let’s clean that pretty face of yours right up.

Do you mind me asking what happened?

***

Hun, I don’t mean to be pushy, but it’s clearly not nothing.

I won’t tell anyone, okay?

And I certainly won’t judge you for whatever happened.

You’ve been reduced to tears, it’s clearly not your fault.

***

Those lot again…?

***

[speaker sighs]

Yes, they tried to do something to me a while back – they put some notes in my locker and tried to trick me into sitting on an egg.

Their loser of a ring leader didn’t realise I’d get fed up so fast and throw the egg at her face.

[chuckles]

You should have seen her face. Proved how completely pathetic she is.

I won’t tell anyone if you want to throw an egg at her too… though I might snap a pic this time.

It’ll help me laugh on a bad day!

***

You’d get in trouble? I didn’t get in trouble, so why would you?

***

…Fair point.

Don’t worry, I won’t let a teacher find out if you do it anyway! It’ll be our little secret.

That way it doesn’t matter who they like, right? What they don’t know can’t hurt them, or you.

***

Trust me, no one from class is a rat. …Except maybe the teacher’s pet, but they’re just one person, and I’m sure we could bribe them.

They’re all really nice once you get to know them!

I’m sure they’d all love you.

***

Of course people notice you, hun!

I know you’re in my class, to start with.

You’re not invisible – just a little… quiet. It’s a cute trait, really.

***

Oh, sorry, did I cross a line calling you cute?

Sorry! Spoke my thoughts without thinking them through, haha!

But, really, you should think about talking to the others.

I can introduce you, if you want!

And a nice little bonus is that those losers won’t think you’re an easy target if you’re around others.

Sorry if that sounds bad hun, but that’s just what I think…

***

Making friends is hard, yes… but like I said, I’ll introduce you to the others!

***

Of course they’ll be nice to you too!

***

Hun, no offense… but how do you think I became popular?

I spoke to people and got to know them.

And I want to speak to you and get to know you too!

So, why don’t we start over?

***

I mean we should properly introduced ourselves. I know we technically already do know each other, but this is our first real conversation!

So, nice to officially meet you! I’m-

[speaker goes silent as the door opens again]

Well, speak of the witch and she shall appear.

What’re you doing here, huh? Do you want another egg to the face?

Can you speak English, or are you going to keep stuttering like an idiot?

Pffft, you look like a fish on land.

Actually, before you even say anything, let me get one thing straight – this person right here you were pretending you were better than?

They’re my friend. So unless you really do want me to make sure your life is a living hell, back. The hell. Off.

Have I made myself clear? Or do I actually need to find some eggs for you to learn your lesson again?

[bully runs away]

That’s what I thought!

…Jeez, she really ran away with her tail between her legs, didn’t she?

[speaker laughs]

Wow, that felt good! Last time she was shrieking too much for me to get a word in edgeways.

***

Oh, hun, no need to thank me! I’ve been wanting to give her a piece of my mind for ages.

You should’ve said something too!

She would’ve started crying. …Er, but then again, I’d feel bad if I actually made her cry.

I’d be as bad as her making you cry, even if it was technically karma.

Or maybe I’m just being too nice?

…Well, it didn’t happen, so I guess it doesn’t matter.

But if she does try to come up to you again and you don’t feel like you can say anything, just call me, okay?

I’m more than happy to dish out some just desserts!

We’re friends now, after all!

***

Yep, I mean it! You’re now a part of my group, hun – so if anyone tries to hurt you, they’re getting not only my wrath but everyone else’s too!

***

If you introduce yourself to them, you won’t be bothering them, silly!

Let’s go say hi already! We can plan what we want to do after class too!

Oh, just for reference, sometimes we go to the arcade over in the next town and see who can win the most toys from the crane machines, or we go to this café that’s just a couple blocks down the road – yeah, that one! – and order one of everything off the menu to see who can eat the most…

But if that’s not your style, we can always figure out something else. And don’t say anything about being a burden, because you won’t be! So don’t waste time thinking about it, think about what you want to do instead!

Everyone in my group just loves hanging out with each other, so we don’t really care about what we’re doing as long as we can chat.

Regardless, whatever we end up doing, it’ll be tons of fun, I promise!

You won’t remember anything that happened earlier, hun.

[speaker laughs]

Come on, now that I’ve claimed you as part of the group you can’t keep the others waiting! Let’s go make your grand entrance to them!