Part 1

Context: You work at a gas station, which is already pretty miserable. However, this one has a repeat customer that causes a lot of problems. Not because he complains, shouts, steals, or abuses employees, no. He's a supervillain, and you're the only one brave enough to ring him up almost daily. It's odd that he started coming by more frequently after you started, but you were sure it was a coincidence... until he asked you out.

Setting: His home

Tags:[M4A][Strangers to Lovers][Sub Tsundere Supervillain Speaker][Friendly Dom Listener][Flirting][Wholesome]to[Hot][Mild Comedy][Supervillain x Powerless][Gender Neutral][First Date][Adorkable][Reverse Comfort][SPICY][CW: High Spice]

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[Scene opens in his apartment]

[SFX: Light classical music / a chair squeaking on marble flooring]

“Here we are… Please, have a seat.”

[SFX: The Listener sitting]

[His cool aura echoes in how Spartan his home is]

“Thank you for… agreeing to let me cook for you for our first date. Being a villain makes it difficult to go out to dinner, much less with a date. I promise I read up on cooking to make sure dinner would be sumptuous and made sure the apartment was clean and comfortable.”

[Pause?]

[He snorts, almost sparing a smile]

“Do I ever loosen up? Villain, my dear. So, no. If you want someone a bit more chaotic…”

[Pause <3]

“Hmhm, good. It’s just steak and garlic mash, I’m sure even I can’t mess it up that badly, hm? Feel free to put something on the TV, if you want. Or just enjoy the fire providing some nice white noise with the music.”

[SFX: Him vanishing into the kitchen]

[You sit and watch the fire for a bit, side-eyeing the bearskin rug before it]

[SFX: The steam of meat hitting a hot skillet]

“Hm? Oh, the bearskin rug? Yes, it was a gift from a fellow villain… She’s quite good at hunting, saw my neat little flat, and decided, ‘You know what this place needs? A dead grizzly bear!’. Eugh… I hate being rude so I set it before the fire. Named him ‘Jim’.”

[Pause <3?]

[He makes a strangled, embarrassed noise]

“I will have you know that is not my ‘make love in front of the fireplace’ support bear! Hmph. You are far too much when you don’t have to use your customer service voice, you know?”

[Pause <3]

“Haha, very funny. I’ve got to turn the mixer on the whip the potatoes so just-”.

[SFX: A mixer going haywire]

“No no no no no NO NO NO!!!”

[SFX: Potatoes being slung wildly]

[You peer over and see him wrestling with the mixer as it sprays the kitchenette with potatoes]

[Pause!]

“Pfft, blagh, oh this is awful! I’m unplugging it, I heard you!”

[SFX: The mixer dying down]

[He stands in the wreckage, looking like he’s counting to preserve his temper]

“OK, OK, easy, old boy, remember what Gabe said… Just count to ten and, by then, you’ll realize it’s not even that big of a deal, phew. One… two…”

[SFX: A smoke alarm sounding off]

“OH FUCK ME, THE STEAKS!”

[He scrambles and takes the skillet off the heat, dejected]

[...Pause?]

“...Yes, you may as well just order a pizza…”

[He palms his face and slinks into the living room, slumping to the floor]

“...Idiot… I’m such a damned idiot…”

[SFX: Phone noises]

[You put in an order for some pizza and go to sit with him]

“Hm? Oh, yeah, the pizza always gets here in five minutes or less in the villain complex.”

[Pause!]

“Mmhm… One perk to being completely blacklisted by society… Fast pizza, poor life skills, and a disappointed date that probably expected better…”

[...]

[SFX: A doorbell/pizza being retrieved]

[The door rings and you go to grab the pizza, bringing it back in with you. You sit again and he’s still as listless, just looking into the fire]

“Pizza’s here? Sure… There are drinks in the fridge, the plates are in that cabinet there.”

[...Pause?]

“No, I… I’m really not hungry, thank you… Honestly, if you just wanted to leave with the damned box, I feel it’d be justified. I’ve wasted good food, I’ve wasted good pizza, and now I’ve wasted your night, of which you probably do not get much off… I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I pushed for this… I just wanted so badly to think that, maybe… I could be happy. And, somehow, I could make you happy…”

[...]

[SFX: The pizza box shifting/a ballistic pepperoni slice]

[You open the box enough to snag a pepperoni and then flick it right into his face. It slaps against his cheek and hangs there while he recoils slightly]

“What in Satan’s name-?!”

[Pause! <3]

[He looks at you in disbelief]

“Did you just… Flick a pepperoni in my face? While I was opening up to you? In my time of great need???”

[Pause.]

[He pauses, plucking it from his cheek and studying it with a frown. Then, to your surprise, he lets out a laugh]

“Pfft, hahahaha! Do they give you bulletproof shields in retail or do you just need that stern ‘No’ to get people to behave?”

[Pause <3]

[He chuckles and eats the pepperoni, studying you as he does so]

[...Pause]

“Well, I can’t stay I’ve ever been both assaulted by and therapeutically healed by a slice of pepperoni. Until tonight… Hmhm. Is it good pizza?”

[Pause <3]

[He snorts in response]

“..Fine, I’ll have a slice or two. Have to win my honor back by consuming the pepperoni and its family, right?”

[Pause <3]

[You eat together in a relatively comfortable silence until you notice his eyes are fixated on you]

[P-Pause…]

“Am I staring? Oh, no… How rude of me. Almost like I’m some kind of bad boy, isn’t it?”

[His eyes are far too intense]

“Are you going to ‘command’ me? Demand that I stop staring? Reprimand me for being a ‘bad boy’?”

[P-Pause…]

[SFX: Him leaning forward]

“...You are incredibly attractive… Do you know that? I go out of my way to destroy my gut with cheap, gas station food, just to come and see you. And it’s… humiliating. To be such a helpless puppy for a civilian, just trying to live their life…”

[Pause…]

[You rest your hand on his arm and he gently takes it, moving so it is pinned above your head with the other]

[SFX: The Listener falling back slightly on the rug]

“...Oops. You put your hand on my arm and now I have you pinned under me, before a roaring fire, on a bearskin rug… Bit of pizza grease on your top, Heavens! Perhaps we should get it off of you.”

[P-Pause! <3]

[He studies you, intense, lips inches from yours]

“If you say stop, I will. If you say ‘No’, then I will relent. I’m a villain, yes, but… you are important to me. More important than any selfish desires… I want you. I’ve wanted you so badly that I can hardly think of anything else, especially after you set me straight when that stupid clock fell on my head…”

[He pauses and gives a wry smile]

[Pause…?]

“Why am I smiling? Oh, just thinking that, if we ever do truly get together, we’ll have one of the dumbest meet-cute stories. ‘I was buying junk food, a clock fell on my head, I telekinetically destroyed the store until the cute attendant turned me into a sub’.”

[Pause <3]

[He chuckles and closes the gap between you, kiss soft but insistent]

“Mmh…”

[Pause <3 <3 <3]

[He’s in control, for the moment, but you don’t mind]

“...Was that alright?”

[There’s the uncertainty]

[Pause!]

[He laughs, easing a little]

“Don’t stop? Well… if that’s what you want, my dear…”

[The dance continues before a crackling fire and a sadly discarded pizza. It can wait, though. It can wait <3]

[To be continued?]

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Note: The amount of people that wanted a continuation of Part 1 is ASBURD.