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Versions addressed to "Dad" and "Mom" below. Feel free to swap out the speaker's love interest for a boy & the rival for a girl, if that makes sense for your channel.

The original version of this audio is here. And I'm on Ko-Fi here, if you ever want to leave me a small tip.

A4F Version

[Vulnerable] Mom, I think there’s something wrong with me.

[Pause]

Look, it’s really nice of you to say that, but I don’t mean that I’m ugly or stupid or whatever. I mean I need therapy or a padded cell or prison or…

[Pause]

[Increasingly frustrated] No, Mom, nobody’s bullying me. No, I’m not covering for them. Yes, I would tell you if somebody was bothering me. Mom, listen to me. Mom. Mom! I almost killed someone!

[Softer] I almost killed someone.

[Pause]

What do mean “Is that all?” Isn’t that enough?

[Pause]

[Vulnerable] Am I in love? [Fast & Firm] Yes. [Unsure] No. I don’t know. I don’t think this is what love’s supposed to be like. This isn’t…It’s…I mean, love at first sight isn’t really love, is it? It’s like…a crush or infatuation or limerence or something. You don’t just pass someone in the halls and fall in love with them.

[Pause]

[Thrown Off] Well, okay, that might be how you met Dad, but your feelings have, like, changed and grown and stuff, right? No? Uh, alright. Cool, I guess. Anyway, there’s this girl, Annabeth, and she’s…[loving] amazing.

I’ve been trying to get up the courage to ask her out for like 2 months now, but I’m not the only person who likes her. [Loving] She’s just so kind and gorgeous and funny and of course everyone loves her.

Maybe I’m just jealous. Maybe not everybody wants to date her, but her friend Jason definitely does.

There was this…moment…when Jason and I were alone together. I knew that all I had to do was step forward and push, and Jason would just disappear. But I didn’t. I just froze for 30 seconds? A minute? It felt like a long time, but it couldn’t have been…God, Mom, I wanted to hurt him so badly. I just wanted him gone. Then, when it started to feel inevitable, when I was so close to just…just running forward and shoving him off the edge, Annabeth showed up. I keep thinking, what would have happened if she hadn’t come looking for us? But I don’t have to think about it. I know. I know exactly what would have happened, and I…I don’t know how I’m supposed to…I’m so scared, Mom.

[Pause]

It’s not okay.

[Pause]

[Stressed] I know you’re trying to make me feel better, but can you please be a little less calm about this?

[Pause]

No, I don’t want you to ground me! I want you to take this seriously, and yeah, I guess grounding me might be a start because I’m not sure if I’m safe around other people.

[Pause]

You’re not gonna punish me for something I didn’t do? You don’t understand. I was going to…I came so close…

[Pause]

[Baffled] You’re proud of me? Why?

[Pause]

You’re proud of me for not killing my classmate? Look, I know you love me and everything, but…

[Pause]

[Confused, Overwhelmed] What? You’re messing with me, right?

[Pause]

[Dull] You killed your classmates in high school, and you’re laughing about it.

[Pause]

What the fuck, Mom?

[Short Pause]

[Annoyed] Really? [Rushed] Okay, fine. Whatever. Sorry for cursing. Does Dad know about this?

[Short Pause]

[Combative] And he’s okay with it?

[Pause]

[Combative] Yeah, I bet he did take a while to come around.

[Pause]

[Combative] If I’m taking a tone with you, it’s kind of justified. You’re literally a murderer.

[Pause]

[Combative] So what if you were in love? A lot of people are in love, Mom, and they don’t do stuff like this.

[Pause]

Look, I…I guess you think this is normal or something, but it really, really isn’t. I need to talk to someone.

[Pause]

Yes, I am talking to you, but it’s kind of making things worse.

You know what? Forget it. I’m gonna go talk to Dad. I went to you first because I thought you would freak out less, but it turns out I need someone to freak out way more so…uh, thanks for the advice, Mom.

[Reluctant] Love you, too.

A4M Version

[Vulnerable] Dad, I think there’s something wrong with me.

[Pause]

Look, it’s really nice of you to say that, but I don’t mean that I’m ugly or stupid or whatever. I mean I need therapy or a padded cell or prison or…

[Pause]

[Increasingly frustrated] No, Dad, nobody’s bullying me. No, I’m not covering for them. Yes, I would tell you if somebody was bothering me. Dad, listen to me. Dad. Dad! I almost killed someone!

[Softer] I almost killed someone.

[Pause]

What do mean “Is that all?” Isn’t that enough?

[Pause]

[Vulnerable] Am I in love? [Fast & Firm] Yes. [Unsure] No. I don’t know. I don’t think this is what love’s supposed to be like. This isn’t…It’s…I mean, love at first sight isn’t really love, is it? It’s like…a crush or infatuation or limerence or something. You don’t just pass someone in the halls and fall in love with them.

[Pause]

[Thrown Off] Well, okay, that might be how you met Mom, but your feelings have, like, changed and grown and stuff, right? No? Uh, alright. Cool, I guess. Anyway, there’s this girl, Annabeth, and she’s…[loving] amazing.

I’ve been trying to get up the courage to ask her out for like 2 months now, but I’m not the only person who likes her. [Loving] She’s just so kind and gorgeous and funny and of course everyone loves her.

Maybe I’m just jealous. Maybe not everybody wants to date her, but her friend Jason definitely does.

There was this…moment…when Jason and I were alone together. I knew that all I had to do was step forward and push, and Jason would just disappear. But I didn’t. I just froze for 30 seconds? A minute? It felt like a long time, but it couldn’t have been…God, Dad, I wanted to hurt him so badly. I just wanted him gone. Then, when it started to feel inevitable, when I was so close to just…just running forward and shoving him off the edge, Annabeth showed up. I keep thinking, what would have happened if she hadn’t come looking for us? But I don’t have to think about it. I know. I know exactly what would have happened, and I…I don’t know how I’m supposed to…I’m so scared, Dad.

[Pause]

It’s not okay.

[Pause]

[Stressed] I know you’re trying to make me feel better, but can you please be a little less calm about this?

[Pause]

No, I don’t want you to ground me! I want you to take this seriously, and yeah, I guess grounding me might be a start because I’m not sure if I’m safe around other people.

[Pause]

You’re not gonna punish me for something I didn’t do? You don’t understand. I was going to…I came so close…

[Pause]

[Baffled] You’re proud of me? Why?

[Pause]

You’re proud of me for not killing my classmate? Look, I know you love me and everything, but…

[Pause]

[Confused, Overwhelmed] What? You’re messing with me, right?

[Pause]

[Dull] You killed your classmates in high school, and you’re laughing about it.

[Pause]

What the fuck, Dad?

[Short Pause]

[Annoyed] Really? [Rushed] Okay, fine. Whatever. Sorry for cursing. Does Mom know about this?

[Short Pause]

[Combative] And she’s okay with it?

[Pause]

[Combative] Yeah, I bet he did take a while to come around.

[Pause]

[Combative] If I’m taking a tone with you, it’s kind of justified. You’re literally a murderer.

[Pause]

[Combative] So what if you were in love? A lot of people are in love, Dad, and they don’t do stuff like this.

[Pause]

Look, I…I guess you think this is normal or something, but it really, really isn’t. I need to talk to someone.

[Pause]

Yes, I am talking to you, but it’s kind of making things worse.

You know what? Forget it. I’m gonna go talk to Mom. I went to you first because I thought you would freak out less, but it turns out I need someone to freak out way more so…uh, thanks for the advice, Dad.

[Reluctant] Love you, too.