Part 1

Part 2

Context: You were the Queen of a small kingdom, minding its business in a far-off sector of space. Unfortunately, said sector had seen attacks from the Dread Pirate aka the Pirate King aka the Nameless Captain. A man of legendary status, you once invited him to a gala to try and speak. He was as stubborn as you expected, and nothing really got done... except that he fell in love with you, that night. You've made him obsess, and he doesn't appreciate being teased. So, he came to collect you, killing thousands for pleasure, including your husband. You are the Pirate Queen, now... like it or not.

Setting: The Dread Pirate's ship

Tags:[MMM4F][Enemies to Lovers?][Yandere Pirate King Speaker][Crewmate Speaker][Rescuer Speaker][Fallen Queen Listener][Confession][Pirate][Sci-Fi][Teasing][Flirting][Lapsitting][VERY Spicy][Lore Drops][Obsessed][Enough to Kill For Listener][Oddly Honorable][Comfort][CW: Mild Violence]

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[C] = Carus, the Dread Pirate

[D] = Denford, professional love guru

[P] = Pietro, Captain of the Envoy

[Scene opens back aboard the Dread Pirate’s ship]

[SFX: The infinite hum of space / Sci-Fi machinery]

[Months have passed. At present, the Dread Pirate has you in his lap as he surveys the bridge]

[C] “Come now, love… It’s been months now. Aren’t you used to sitting pretty on my lap in front of the crew?”

[...]

[C] “Hmhm… So very stoic. You were a bit less so when I had you raking your nails down my back.”

[Pause!]

[He laughs as you punch his arm in raw fury]

[SFX: A soft impact]

[C] “Oof, oh no, the Missus has broken all my ribs! Boys, call for a surgeon, a Priest, and a lawyer that can argue the Devil down!”

[SFX: Some of the crewmates laughing]

[Pause.]

[C] “Hmhm, aww. I know you hate me, love. Little kiss for your husband?”

[...]

[You try to quickly peck his lips but he pulls you in shamelessly]

[C] “Mmh… ah, ah, ah, trying to peck my lips all quick and slip away…”

[Pause!]

[SFX: A brief, powerful hum encased in crackling lightning]

[You jolt as electricity bursts through your fists and try to hide it. Naturally, he won’t allow it]

[P-Pause!]

[C] “... And what was that little jolt of power that ran through your fist just now, dearest?”

[...]

[C] “Hmhm, oh, aye, I bet you don’t know… Don’t play dumb with me, woman, we both know you’re too smart for your own damned good.”

[...]

[C] “...Really? They never taught you what it was? You’re being honest…”

[Pause]

[C] “Hmm… Well, it’s called something like Paragodus, I believe. Translates to ‘People’s Champion’. Only heard it in the tongues of rumors, but they said that this person is one that lives so much for their people that they can rise up to challenges that would defy all odds to protect them.”

[...]

[At your dismay, he does something rare. He speaks with real empathy:]

[C] “...They were truly loyal, dedicated people. I want you to know that I have their full respect for standing up to me even when given the chance to flee.”

[He sighs deeply]

[C] “...I never wanted it… us… to begin like this. Rrgh, this… I can’t!”

[Pause??]

[He turns you to him, seemingly agonized]

[C] “There is something I must tell y-”.

[SFX: An alarm blaring]

[The shriek of the alarm startles you. His fingers dig into your shoulders briefly, just a touch painful, his head bowed to obscure his face]

[D] “Hostile ship inbound, your Majesty!”

[Pause]

[Carus snaps his head up so suddenly that you flinch. His smile is ear to ear, fanged, eyes wide and wild]

[C] “Of… course. Finally get a moment to bear my fucking heart and VENTA BLACK SOUL TO THE MISSUS, but NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!.”

[He bows his head again with a few wild giggles]

[Pause…]

[D] “Oh, don’t worry, Ma’am, he’s fine! He’s just sad the mood got bitchskipped!”

[C] “DOOOOON’T YOU OUT ME, DENFORD!”

[D] “C’mon, Highness, I’ve wing-manned for you so hard! Trust in the love guru!”

[Pause???]

[D] “Haha, yeah, the pillows were my suggestion!”

[Pause!]

[D] “Thank you, Miss! Always appreciate someone recognizing my incredible sense of fashion! Oh, uh, some chuds want to talk to you, Highness.”

[Carus stands and sets you gently on the floor before he storms to the COM, practically punching the line button in]

[C] “WHO ARE YOU AND WHY SHOULD I NOT SEDUCE YOUR MOTHER?!”

[Pause]

[There’s a brief flicker of static before a very uncertain voice answers]

[P] “Uh-”.

[C] “TICK, TOCK, TICK, TOCK, I’M LOOKING HER UP RIGHT NOW-!”

[Pause!]

[You recognize the voice and gasp. The man on the other end gasps too]

[P, with a gasp] “Your Highness! You’re still alive! Oh, thank the stars, we’ve been searching for you for months!”

[Carus’s expression goes from furious to chillingly cold. His tone calms down to a soothing near monotone]

[C] “By interstellar law, you must identify yourself to a ship within a set range. Identify yourself.”

[...]

[P] “This is Captain Pietro of the Envoy. We have come to retrieve the hostage!”

[...]

[C, still icy] “I believe, if you review your reports, you will find she is not a hostage at all. You should do that and vacate our lane immediately.”

[P] “We don’t need to review anything! We have our orders from his Highness! Now, disable your weapon systems and surrender her Highness!”

[...?]

[You look at Carus and he’s gone. Lights on, no one home, save for one murderous giggle]

[C] “Disable weapon systems, you say? Oh, very well…”

[Pause]

[P, startled] “Weapon systems have been disabled! How-?!”

[C] “Shh, shh. You should save these final moments to think about everything that led you up to this point. Apologize to your mothers for wasting their time.”

[SFX: An ominous hum of building energy]

[D, casual] “Three hundred aboard the Envoy, Highness.”

[C] “Oof, that is going to be a LOT of paperwork for some bitter middle-aged secretary on the south quadrant. Hm. Welp! You know what to do.”

[D] “Aye, aye!”

[Pause!!!]

[P] “Envoy c-crew, emergency evacuation procedures!”

[C] “Ohhh, it’s a little late for that, you poor, simpering little lapdog…”

[SFX: The hum building]

[Pause!!!!!]

[You plead with him and he grins at you sadistically, in response]

[C] “Oh no, the poor widdle soldiers are going to die… and my Queen cares oh so much.”

[Pause!!]

[The Dread Pirate laughs and turns from you]

[C] “Den, be a love and blow them right the fuck out of my sight, won’t you?”

[...]

[SFX: The crackling of lightning]

[Power rushes through you but, this time, you’re dead calm. You know what you need to do]

[D] “Ready to fire on your order, Highness!”

[Pause.]

[Den practically throws his hands up in surrender when he looks up and sees the look on your face]

[D] “Oh, Hell no.”

[C] “Excuse me? You’re disobeying my orders, Den?”

[D] “Sir, with respect, your wife looks like she’s ready to fight a final boss.”

[You turn toward Carus, fists clenched]

[C] “Excuse me?! W-What…?”

[For a split second, you see something in his eyes you never thought you’d see: surprise. You charge him faster than light and slam your fist into his chest, hard as possible]

[C] “GUH-!”

[D] “Ooh shit-!”

[P] “My Queen?! Please come in, what’s happening?!”

[Pause!]

[Carus grabs the COM again, holding his ribs. With a half-groan/half-snarl, he answers:]

[C] “It would, nngh, seem your Queen and my dearest, darling, most wonderful wife just broke two of my gods’ damned RIBS!”

[Pause.]

[He pauses, staring you down. You stare him down right back]

[P] “...H-Holy shit, really?”

[C] “Yes, rrgh… really. Pietro, be a good little boy and wait right there, hm? Apparently, my bride wants to have a little chat. With fists.”

[Pause.]

[P] “My Queen…? You want us to leave you? B-But…”

[C, through grit teeth] “Pietro. Mommy and Daddy are talking. Go to your room, and I’ll deal with you and your pathetic little fleet later!”

[Pause?]

[The Dread Pirate perks an eyebrow]

[C] “You’re really asking if that was a threat?”

[Pause.]

[His eyes narrow]

[C] “And if it is?”

[Pause.]

[Carus is silent but you hear Pietro murmur:]

[P] “Holy shit, she threatened to smack the smug off of his face… Guys, please tell me someone recorded that, this is so badass!”

[PAUSE]

[At the same time as you yell it, Carus yells the same:]

[C] “LEAVE, PIETRO!”

[P] “Y-Yes my King! Er, I mean, Queen! Don’t worry, my lady, we’ll make sure you’re returned home as soon as possible! The King will be so pleased to see you! Yeoman, to warp drive!”

[SFX: The ship hitting warp drive and vanishing]

[...?]

[Carus lets out a sigh, anger fading somewhat]

[C] “...Stupid child… Butting, rrgh, in where he has no business being… Huh… I forgot how, hh, painful broken ribs are. Kudos to you, love.”

[Pause?!]

[C, quietly] “...Aye. The King still lives. I never killed him… because I never needed to. I’ve been trying to spare you for months now. I’m happy to be the villain, it’s what I’m used to, but… the truth is that, when I came to challenge him, he sold you to me.”

[...]

[SFX: Some paper rustling]

[Carus digs into his regal coats and produces a roll of parchment]

[C] “Damned backwoods planet, still using paper… Here. Proof that I’m not lying.”

[You examine the paper and, indeed, it is a contract signing you away, signed by your husband]

[...]

[C, actually gentle] “I’m sorry… I wanted to spare you this humiliation as best I could. We staged a whole invasion, had people pretend to die, and, because that man is the most spineless bastard in this universe, he pleaded with me to save his ‘good name’ and ‘honor’ by insisting I’d killed him in an honorable duel…”

[...]

[You slide to your knees, the power that had filled you fading in an instant. Carus kneels by you, oddly sympathetic]

[C] “...I offered to duel him honorably but he refused. Demanded to know why I would wish to duel over his Queen and not the riches or lush lands he had to offer. I told him plainly that I was madly in love with you, and could easily be a better husband.”

[He sighs, wincing]

[C] “Nnh… For however much you loathe me, however remorseless and heartless you think I am… my love for you is genuine, and it scares the void out of me.”

[...Pause?]

[C] “Why? Because I’ve never loved someone like I love you. Lusted after, certainly, maybe even adored. But what I am is not something that loves easily, if at all. You make me vulnerable, and I hate that… but the thought of him having you, touching you, tasting you… I hated that infinitely more.”

[Pause]

[He gently cups your chin and tilts your head up to look at him]

[C] “...You are a Queen, through and through. You channeled the power of your people so strongly that you were able to deal physical damage to me. I know what he did pains you, but I hope you can even begin to understand how incredible you are.”

[...]

[C] “You deserve a life of adventure, my sweet. You always have… So… Take your time to hurt. I know what you gave to appease that pitiful excuse of a man, and I know how much giving can take. But when that hurt gets more bearable, the entire universe is yours to explore.”

[...Pause]

[C] “Of course I’ll help you up. Come here.”

[He picks you up easily, as though you were precious]

[C] “Alright, boys, girls, everything else, Code Alan - I’m going to bed at 2 PM, bugger off!”

[SFX: The crew cheering / the hiss of the bedchambers door opening and then closing]

[...Pause]

[C] “...I’m sorry that I didn’t tell you immediately. I’d originally wanted to confront home with you standing there so you could see my sincerity, but I caught him alone. Vile cretin… Would rather harm you than face me honorably.”

[...]

[SFX: The bed shifting]

[C] “Here… Rest, for a bit. I need to attend the bridge but I’ll be back. Alright?”

[...Pause]

[He seems taken aback for a moment before answering with a simple:]

[C] “...You are welcome. Rest well, my bride.”

[SFX: The door hissing open and closed again]

[To be continued]