Context: The neighbor boy has always been a jerk that loves to show off his muscles and tease you, same as his dumb friends. You do your best to ignore him, but he seems intent on getting a rise out of you. Maybe he'll just get one today, hm?

Setting: Home - Exterior

Tags:[M4A][Enemies to ?][Hot Tsundere Bully Neighbor Speaker][Unimpressed Listener][Argument][Flirting][Feelings?][Gaslighting/Manipulation][VERY Spicy][Daddy Drop][Heartbroken][Get Dunked On][Listener Mystery?][CW: A Man Getting Destroyed]

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[Scene opens outside your house]

[SFX: A garage door opening]

[You drag the trash out early in the morning, trying to figure out what soda to grab]

[SFX: The trash bin trundling along/a cat whistle]

“Mime… Hey, Mime… C’mon, I know you can hear me.”

[Pause.]

“Pffft, saying ‘No, I can’t’ doesn’t work, and you know it. C’mon, what’s wrong? Trying to avoid the light bouncing off these magnificent pecs while I was the hot rod?”

[Pause.]

[SFX: The trash bin stopping and the Listener walking back]

“Aww, c’mon, Mime. Have the common courtesy to at least say good morning and let me get my usual bull schtick out of the way.”

[...]

[He shoots a smirk at you as he runs his fingers through his hair]

“Well, if it isn’t the Mime. Morning, sweetheart.”

[Pause]

“Hehe… Am I always out here, shirtless, they ask. C’mon hon, we’ve been neighbors for a year now, you know the answer. Why, you been counting how many times you’ve ogled me?”

[Pause?]

[He blinks, taken aback]

“Uhm… Yeah, the T-Bird is coming along real nice. Nearly had her purring the other night but then she decided it was hellfire and brimstone night instead of tacos. I’m surprised you remembered one of my projects.”

[Pause]

“Hm, I guess you are decent at listening. Or pretending to. Either way, it’s cute that you spend some thought power thinking about me.”

[Pause]

“Ohh, of course, Mime. Little shy neighbor goblin just happens to remember.”

[Pause]

“Sheesh, what are you in a hurry for? It’s Saturday, and you don’t exactly seem like the type to have plans outside of the house.”

[Pause]

“Pfft, of course, it's a marathon of a show you’ve seen ten times. How very you.”

[Pause]

“Hey, disassembling and reassembling the same car ten times is not the same, OK? You get your hands in the guts of a machine some time and then try and talk trash.”

[Pause]

“Shop at school doesn’t c- you know what, you are just extra bratty today. If you could make another face besides that grumpy Persian cat one, you might pass for cute in an unironic way. Well, maybe like a pug…”

[Pause]

“Yeah, wearing hoodies that swallow you and staring blankly at people doesn’t help either. There’s a betting ring on when you’re going to finish transforming into a zombie and kickstart the cynical mime apocalypse.”

[...]

[For just a moment, the veneer slips]

“...Real talk, though, have you been OK? You’ve seemed kind of… ill, as of late.”

[Pause?]

[He throws his hands up with a dramatic groan]

“Really? Did you really just accuse me of asking about your health so that I could get better odds on the bet?”

[Pause.]

“And of being shallow…”

[Pause.]

[His smirk turns into a sneer. He’s achieving his final form of seductive asshole]

“Oh, I’m shallow, huh? You’re the one that’s been ogling me for the past ten minutes.”

[Pause.]

“Tch, I have not been ‘flaunting’ for you, Mime. I just like seeing you flustered. Plus, how else am I going to wash the car, huh? In my snow parka? Whatever will the thirsty old ladies across the street ogle then? You wouldn’t deny them these sweet pecs, would you?”

[Pause.]

[He raises an eyebrow]

“Geeze, you are such a little cynic… Any time I talk to you, you act like it’s just to prank you or pick on you! How could you accuse me of such a mean, nasty thing, when I am but a good Church boy! I would never do something like pick on my neighbor!”

[...]

[He winks at you]

“Hey, c’mon, that’s only true, like… ninety percent of the time. Besides, if I really wanted to get under your skin, I’d just jump the fence, get right up close and watch you turn tomato red while my lips inch closer and closer…”

[Pause?]

[He rolls his eyes]

“Sweetie, those guys are not my ‘friends’. We all just use each other out of convenience and then talk shit behind each other’s backs. That’s how it is. I’m not surprised they pick on you too, though. You make it pretty fun.”

[...]

[SFX: Him hopping the fence]

“Hup! And now your backyard is mine.”

[Pause?]

[He grins, striding toward you confidently]

“Yep, thems the rules, Mime… Ooh, that was genuine disgust! Fair enough. From now on, I’m pronouncing ‘Mime’ like ‘Mee-Mee’, just to watch you suffer.”

[You fold your arms and let him stride on over, water running down his muscles]

[Pause.]

“Ohhhh, ‘Mee-Mee’ here isn’t scampering away from the neighbor boy they fantasize about?”

[Pause?]

[He perks an eyebrow]

“Oh, you think I fantasize about you, hm? Reverse situation… Interesting. And pretty presumptuous of you.”

[Pause]

“...I am not the only one that initiates talking, you-”.

[Pause]

“Fine, you’re not exactly the biggest extrovert…”

[Pause]

[You calmly lay things out for him, keeping eye contact with him until it’s agony for you both]

“...You think my game is to get you to fall for me as a prank or just as another notch in my belt, then brag in front of my shitty friends to make myself feel better about not being able to have a relationship not based in gross manipulation? You know, you’re starting to piss me off, Mime…”

[Pause]

[You’ve never seen someone look like the actual sin was slapped out of them, but this is close]

“...Did… Did you just say you want the person using you to actually know what they’re doing…?”

[Pause.]

[He stares at you in disbelief, mouth gawping for words and failing]

“...Because I can’t even get the affection and punishment right, and am wasting both our time trying to pretend to be ‘Daddy’…”

[...]

“Uh… Um. Yeah, I’ll… see you, ah… good talk.”

[SFX: The Speaker hopping the fence and meandering away]

[...]

[You did warn him. Dumbass pretty boy]

[SFX: The Listener grabbing their drinks and vanishing back inside]

[If you didn’t know better, you’d say you could hear him physically suffering, but whatever. It’s marathon time]

[To be continued?]

Note: Listener so savage that pretty boy is going to regress to just ‘boy’.