Context: You don't remember anything past two years ago, but you've still managed to build a life for yourself. Your own job, home... you've finally found your footing. At least until two men show up and accuse you of being a princess.

Setting: The Listener's home

Tags:[MM4F][Half-Vamp/Half-Werewolf Kuudere Butler Speaker][Half-Vamp/Half-Werewolf Bakadere Butler Speaker][Runaway Princess Listener][Amnesia][Argument][Missing]to[Found][Slight Mystery][Wait, Is This a Harem?][It Better Not Be >:(][Implied Arranged Marriage][CW: Yelling/Distress]

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[B] = Ilandere, the stoic butler

[H] = Hadassah, his brother, a goofier butler

[Scene opens within the Listener’s home]

[SFX: A knock on the door]

[You go to the door but it’s open before you can blink]

[SFX: The door swinging open and dress shoes crossing the threshold]

[B] “Do not scream. Please.”

[Pause]

[You stand petrified as the well-dressed man approaches you]

[B] “Princess, please… We have been doing this little dance for over a year now. The King is worried sick, and your fiance is quite eager to see you safely returned.”

[...???]

[The man pauses, expression turning concerned]

[B] “Who… am I? Princess, I am Ilandere, your butler. Do you… not remember?”

[...]

[B] “...Oh no. Hadassah! Call for our doctors, immediately!”

[Another man gives a thumbs up from outside and gets on his phone]

[...]

[B] “Ah… shh, no no no, Princess. Please… I would never dream of harming you. Please do not cry.”

[Pause!]

[He looks around your home, uncertain]

[B] “I-I… I am sure we can relocate all of your things to the manor, Princess. Please, your distress… it seems so real this time, a-and… and I’m growing frightened you were harmed when I was not here!”

[Pause!!!]

[B] “What?! Men took you hostage and then left you on the side of the road once they had their money?! Gods above… Oh, you must have been so terrified. Please, can I-?”

[He starts to approach but you scramble back from him]

[Pause!]

[B] “Princess, please! Please… I can prove you are royalty. Here, look for yourself.”

[SFX: Papers being brandished]

[B] “Here, see…? That’s you a few years ago with your father, the King. And the young man next to you in red is the Prince of Umbra, your fiance. They’ve both been so worried since you ran off… You’ve run before, of course, but this is the first time it wasn’t a silly game.”

[...]

[B] “...That’s me, on your other side… We grew up together, you know?”

[...]

[He smiles. It’s a bit sad]

[B] “...Yes, you found me and Haddy trying to sneak food in the royal kitchens. We were starving… but you convinced your parents to take us in instead of having us, ah, relieved of a hand. Or both.”

[Pause!]

[B, surprised] “A-Ah… I guess it is a little barbaric, but… that is how it is, I fear. Princess…?”

[Pause]

[SFX: An escalating heartbeat]

[B] “Princess, your breathing! Shh, no no no no, please, what…? What has happened to you? You’ve always been so calm and docile, I… I don’t understand…”

[Pause!]

[He looks at you, so calm but so uncertain]

[B] “This… IS you, you say…”

[...]

[B] “I… I’m sorry. We’ve been searching for you for two years now, I… I can’t just look away while you run for it. I’m sorry, Princess, I just… Please, your family is so worried. I am worried! I’ve worried every day you’ve been gone, I spent my entire salary trying to track you down, I took beatings from mercenaries to get even a tiny shred of information, and now… You’re here, in front of me… Forgive me, but I can’t let you go.”

[...Pause?]

[He glances down at his right leg]

[B] “Ah… my right leg. Yes… It was broken during an interrogation. Never healed quite right, b-but it’s fine! I swear it. My brother and I would do anything to see you returned home safely.”

[...]

[The other man, Hadassah, enters the room]

[H] “Princess! Oh, it’s so good t-!”

[Pause!!]

[He freezes as you scramble back]

[H] “...Princess? It… It’s Hadassah, remember? Illy and Haddy…?”

[B] “She is suffering from memory loss, I fear… She’s forgotten everything and is… ahm… justifiably terrified of the two men who came here to whisk her away.”

[H] “But… we can’t just… go. I reported that we had found her to the King first thing.”

[Ilandere swears quietly under his breath]

[...]

[B] “Think, think, think… Princess, we cannot let you go, I’m sorry. But we can make your desires to your father known. He’s not an unreasonable man.”

[H, under his breath] “Normally.”

[B] “Haddy…”

[H] “Did you tell her that we’re not human, yet?”

[B] “Haddy!”

[H] “Cause we’re both half-werewolf and half-vampire. No big deal, promise! We don’t shed or eat people… I think. Not really sure what happens when the full moon arrives, but I did wake up in a chicken coop once and-”.

[B] “HADDY.”

[H] “Woop, sorry. Blabbermouth. By the way, she’s about to hit you over the head with a lamp.”

[SFX: A lamp being swung and caught]

[You try and swing the lamp but Ilandere catches it easily]

[B] “Princess, please… We love you with everything we have, we do not want to harm you. Please don’t make us do that…”

[H] “Illy is right. We are your butlers, your guardians, your personal avengers. Even the worst behaved dogs know never to bite the hand of their beloved masters.”

[...]

[Ilandere breathes a sigh of relief and offers his hand]

[B] “Thank you for cooperating, Princess. There is a limousine waiting for us outside. We will get you to your personal staff of doctors immediately. Then, your personal chefs will fix you all of your favorite meals. Perhaps we could go shopping when you are feeling better?”

[...]

[The brothers exchange looks]

[H] “...Please don’t be sad. Damien will be so happy to know you’re OK. He can be a little grumpy, but he means well, and he… loves you.”

[The last two words are said through grit teeth]

[B] “Haddy… Calm yourself. The Princess has enough to deal with, I would think. We’re going to make certain you are comfortable and happy. I promise that… It’s the same promise I gave you when we were children, and you invited us to dine with you on your eleventh birthday. I swore to you that Haddy and I would never stop protecting and caring for you.”

[...]

[H] “Yeah! Like I said, we might be mutts, but we’re real loyal ones. Even took care of all of your plants while you were gone.”

[...]

[H, with a big smile] “You’re welcome! See, there’s a little bit of energy.”

[B] “C’mon, Princess. It won’t be so bad, I promise. We’ll be right there with you, no matter what happens. You have my word, as your loyal guardian.”

[H] “Yes, he’s always this stoic and serious. Great at parties.”

[B] “Keep at it, Haddy, and I’m kicking your ass!”

[H, laughing] “THERE was the slight hick accent, hehe. Can you believe this man tries to sound British when he’s from the fucking South?”

[...]

[H] “There’s a little smile… C’mon, into the limo. I brought a lot of goodies for you, same as always!”

[They escort you outside and into the limo after you lock up your home. The only one you’ve ever known]

[SFX: Them leaving/the door being locked/a limo door being opened]

[B] “Here we are, love. Watch your head.”

[H] “Yeah, it sounds like you’ve bonked it enough, eh?”

[SFX: A swift kick to the ass]

[H] “Ow! Illy…! You LITERALLY kicked my ass!”

[B] “You were warned. In the limo. Now.”

[You all climb in together. The cool interior feels entirely alien]

[SFX: A cork popping and champagne being poured]

[H] “Ahh, here we are. A bit of bubbly to celebrate the return of our beloved Princess! Cheers!”

[SFX: Glasses clinking]

[B] “To better nights.”

[H] “And fairer fights.”

[Pause]

[SFX: The limo driving off]

[To be continued?]

Note: Sorry if I’m quiet for a bit. I’m not in a great place right now, but your comments and support mean everything.