Part 1

Context: Things were going so well until he dumped you. You knew he had his demons, even though he never opened up about them. You're just trying to heal and move on until you received a late-night call... it was him, pleading to see you again. You let him in and he finally told you why he broke up with you. Now, it's the morning after.

Setting: Home

Tags:[M4A][Exes to Lovers?][Tsundere Ex-Boyfriend Speaker][Hurt Listener][Angst][Break-up][Reverse Comfort][Reconciliation?][Panic Attack][Triggered PTSD][HARD Angst][Vulnerable][Cuddling][L-Bombs][Confession][I Need You][Supportive][Hopeful][CW: Military PTSD/Gruesome Imagery]

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[Scene opens at home, in the Listener’s room]

[SFX: Cloth shifting and light snoring]

[When you wake, you’re confused for a moment, seeing as there are a pair of big, strong arms around you. Then, you remember… he’s here, and snoring away]

[Pause?]

“Hnh…? Oh, mmh… Morning.”

[Pause]

“Let you out of my arms…? Do I have to?”

[Pause]

“Breakfast? Mm… yeah, not gonna lie, I’ve been missing your eggs and bacon. And I mean that literally, not figuratively.”

[Pause]

[He snorts, eyes still not open]

“No, you’re a dork… Thanks for letting me stay over. For… agreeing to try and get me some help. I, um… yeah.”

[Pause]

“Yeah, let me get a shower and I’ll meet you downstairs, OK?”

[He kisses you on the cheek then freezes]

“O-Oh, I… I’m sorry I kissed you on the cheek. Force of habit, I guess…”

[Pause]

[He smiles weakly]

“Thanks… I’ll see you downstairs in a few.”

[Pause]

[SFX: The Listener hedging downstairs and getting a skillet heated]

[After a bit, you hear his footsteps on the stairs]

“Ten-minute shower, good enough. Mmh, that smells really good! Is it about done? No rush, you know me. Cavernous stomach.”

[SFX: Oil popping]

[He freezes at the noise]

“B…Baby…?”

[Pause?]

[You turn toward him. He’s pale, shaking violently]

“B…Baby?!...”

[Pause???]

“G-Gunfire…? I-I hear… I hear gunfire!”

[SFX: The oil popping]

“NO!”

[He runs at you and scoops you in his arms, diving behind the wall]

[SFX: Him tackling the Listener to ‘safety’]

“Keep your head down! KEEP YOUR HEAD DOWN!”

[Pause!]

[He pants, eyes wild, holding you close]

“Quiet! Quiet! Shh… I have you, Pat, I have you! You’re gonna be OK, alright?!”

[...]

[You rest your head against his chest and let him ‘protect’ you]

“It’s gonna be OK… We’re gonna go home, I’m going to propose, and you’ll be best man at my wedding, right?! C’mon man, I can’t be out in this fucking desert by myself again!”

[...]

[His breathing is ragged, panicked]

“P-Please man, c’mon! C’mon… P-Please… Please talk to me… C’mon, please…”

[Pause?]

[He glances about nervously]

“W-What… What are they like? Aha, you’ll love them, when you meet. They’re patient as sin but I think I push that limit a little too hard. Fucking miracle they haven’t left me yet…”

[Pause?]

“Why would they? Pat, c’mon, this is weird, and your guts are hanging out and…”

[...]

[His voice turns small. Quiet]

“...They didn’t want me to enlist… But I was a screw-up, didn’t even graduate high school, and all I could do was manual labor. I just… I just wanted to be a better man before I proposed… My family was so proud of me, but they worried and worried and…”

[...]

[Tears fall down his cheeks]

“...Please, God… I don’t want to kill anymore…”

[SFX: The frying pan hissing with oil/him whimpering with each ‘pop’]

[Pause]

“...H-Huh? W-What do you mean you would have said yes?”

[Pause]

“If I had proposed…? P-Pat, c’mon man, you already got a boyfriend, and I got the love of my life waiting back in… back…”

[He blinks a few times and stares first around the room and then down at you]

[...]

[His voice is so small]

“O-Oh god… D-Did I hurt you?”

[Pause]

[SFX: The oil popping]

“Nnh! N-No, baby, you can’t be here! It’s not safe here!”

[...]

[You slowly, gently, rub his back and talk him through it as best you can]

“I… I’m not… in Hell?”

[Pause]

“I’m here… w-with you?”

[Pause]

[His tears fall harder and he pulls you to him, sobbing]

“I-I’m so sorry-!”

[Pause?]

“C-Can… you turn the stove off? Ah… y-you’ll come back, right? You won’t leave me?”

[Pause]

[He lets out a shaky breath as you caress his jawline]

“...I trust you.”

[SFX: The Listener standing, walking into the kitchen, and turning off the stove. A few hisses and pops as they move the pan away from the heat, then returning to him]

“Th… Thank you. Oh god, your arms! No no no no, did I grab you…?”

[Pause]

“It doesn’t matter if I was just trying to protect you! I’m… No, I thought I could do this, I thought I could handle this, but, Jesus Christ, if I reacted that way to some stupid oil popping, I could…”

[He tenses as you sit back down with him and rest your head on his chest]

[Pause]

“A-Ah…”

[You hold him. He holds you, in that terrible, pained silence]

“...Baby?”

[Pause?]

“...Would you really have said yes if I’d proposed…?”

[Pause]

[Silent sobs rack his body as he cries in your arms]

“I… I-I love you so much! I want you so bad but I want you to stay away so I don’t hurt you again, a-and I don’t know what to do!!!”

[SFX: Him crying for a bit while the Listener comforts him]

[Pause]

“Repeat… after you? I-I’ll try, sweetheart. I’ll try.”

[Pause]

“You w-want to be here, with me.”

[Pause]

“You know I-I can get better, even i-if it s-seems hopeless.”

[Pause]

“Y-You’re my friend.”

[Pause]

“You c-care about me.”

[...]

[He pauses, staring into your eyes, tormented]

“...you still love me…”

[...]

“...I wish I could kiss you in a way that wouldn’t taste like blood.”

[Pause]

“...You want to take me to the hospital, don’t you.”

[Pause]

[He sighs, shaking]

“...Please, can I just… rest for a bit? All of that sickness and death, the sounds of the machines, knowing people are probably dying in a room right next door… It’s too much for me right now. I promise, I will go, I just… I need a minute, OK?”

[Pause]

[You settle against him while his breathing calms]

“...More than you signed up for, eh? H-Heh… Babysitting your batshit insane ex while trying to cook some bacon…”

[...]

“...I know you don’t mind… and it fucking kills me.”

[Pause?]

“You ALWAYS ‘don’t mind’... You didn’t mind when I came home, cold, distant, being an outright asshole to you after being away almost a damned year… You tried so hard, and I thought I’d be a big, tough, stoic man and break your heart because, at least, I couldn’t… keep hurting you…”

[...]

“I want to take care of YOU, for once…You’ve always taken care of me, ever since we started dating in high school… All I wanted was to be able to support you, and… and it cost me… everything.”

[...]

[He draws another shaky breath and holds you close]

“I know… I’m still here. You’re still here… I know…”

[He rests his chin on your crown, lips brushing against your hair]

“...I promise… I will try, baby. I owe you that much…”

[SFX: Birds chirping outside]

[It’s only 7 AM]

[To be continued???]

So, people who requested a continuation to this… did I do good? :D