So back story, our friend group consisted of myself, L and her sister, J and a friend called S. Now I am close to J, S and Ls sister who I will call P. We had a good group of gamers who would play and meet up all the time to do stuff. We would drink around Ps house almost all the time and in doing so became friends with L. Eventually J and L got together for a while however I started hearing from P about L being unhappy. It all came ahead when L checked out of the relationship and broke up with J. P had dropped the bombshell on us and we decided ok that’s fair considering the stuff we were being told. After a few days myself P and J got to together to talk about Js breakup and we decided to give him some advice and let him talk about his emotions during the whole thing. At times he would thank us for our advice and then go against them. Now I chalked this up to J being in an emotional state. During all this S had found out through P that J never really considered him a friend and only someone he enjoyed playing games with. To give more insight to this S would be friendly and constantly trying to get close to him and talk with him. It had seemed S thought they were friends as J didn’t really seem like he was rejecting him at all. S and P eventually dropped him as a friend due to the way S found out about J not considering him a friend for years. I have stated in contact with all parties and have heard both sides of the story in the relationship and the friendship P had with J. Apparently P and L would tell J about things he’s done wrong in the relationship he had with L and that he needed to work on them. Now apparently he would better himself for a few weeks then revert back to the way he was, this would happen a few times and eventually P just got tired and decided they had enough and stopped bringing this stuff up to J. P would in turn be hearing the same stuff J was doing from L and started encouraging L to break up with J. As this all came to a head and I had heard about Ls side I decided to get Js side and had been told a lot of the stuff that J had gone through that he had let go because he loved L. He didn’t think there was that big of a problem in his relationship with L as he claimed he did change at times however other times when he brought up concerns he had he was brushed off.
Now I can see how both sides have truths and honestly I believe both. However the real dilemma I have run into is with S and P. P and S have of course dropped J due to the shitty stuff he had done in the relationship, but also to do with his seemingly not friendly relationship he had with S. I am fully supportive of them not being friends with J anymore and I don’t really care about them ever being friends again. I am in my opinion close to J as I have been friends with him for years like P and S. I feel I shouldn’t have a problem with him other than losing some respect due to the things that happened in the relationship. So AITAH?