My 35th birthday is coming up and my parents told me that they’re taking me out to dinner to Cheesecake Factory. Here are some important notes: My parents currently are living with me. They ran into financial struggle and I was able to help get them on their feet. I’m in the process of buying a second home (leaving them to “rent” the first to me). They are not the best with money. For nearly a year now I’ve been skipping dinner. It’s be a topic of discussion (being Hispanic food is a big cultural element). Everyone in my family knows and understand I don’t eat dinner. I’m terribly introverted. I WFH and only go out if necessary or it’s on my terms. I have to medicate to tolerate the social anxiety. I’m very lactose intolerant. Yes I know there’s some menu items that are dairy free but I’ve had enough bad experiences that I’d rather not eat at a restaurant.

Now I know I could “suck it up” and put on a happy face but this is explicitly for my birthday. I’d much rather have my family come over (my sister and nephew were going to meet us at the restaurant) and I cook for them. It makes me happy to do things for others. So I feel guilty that I’m not giving my family the opportunity but also, if they’re doing this for my birthday at least ask for my input, right?