This post pertains to me as well as my friend group as a whole.

My friend group contains 5 of us, we have all been very close. We party together, go to school together, etc. one of our friends, we will call her J, is the person in question. Our friend group went on a weekend city trip over new years to go clubbing and have some much needed fun. While we were on this trip she broke the news to us that she had met a guy (we will call him A) and he asked her out. We were all super happy for her and she was visibly excited. A few weeks after that was the first time she had brought him around us. He was very shy and quiet, we all tried to talk with him and include him and nothing would work, she would speak for him and then they left really early, which was out of character for her but we didn’t look too much into it. However over the last few months the same pattern has persisted. We invite her over she either flakes because “A is tired” or “A doesn’t want to go out tonight.”Or if they did show up, he would never talk to us, he would always sit on his phone away from everyone and they would leave early. We feel as if he is very controlling of her. He never socializes with any of us, yet she never comes out or hangs with us without him around. She always seems more and more sad and bored. We feel as if we have lost our friend to her relationship with someone who ignores us when we try to include him. Are we the assholes for wanting to talk with her that we feel like she isn’t being herself, and we believe it’s because of their relationship? Or do we have a real reason to be concerned. Bad/unhealthy relationships happen all the time, but at the same time we don’t want to overstep our role as her friends. Some advice on what to do would be so helpful. Should we approach her about our concerns? If so what’s the healthiest way to go about it?