Things in my life have been in a downward spiral since January… just consistently one thing after another. Health issues, financial issues, vehicle issues, homelessness issues, relationship issues, family issues… you name it, it’s happened this year!

I’m in between jobs, and I accepted a position in my hometown. It’s 30 miles away from me and I had my pre employment physical this morning. I’ve been telling my older sister for days about this appointment, what time it was and everything. I try not to confide in her too much because it always results in her spinning things into how she’s a victim, she’s struggling, she’s broke… everything I’ve experienced this year either she is “currently” experiencing too or by some coincidence something similar happens to her shortly. Background info on her ( she’s a pathological, habitual liar, she’s extremely controlling, master manipulator, and prescription drug abuser.) She’s one of the main reasons I have such massive trust issues and violently fear manipulation. Anytime I’ve ever “crossed” her in life she has been able to manipulate situations and people against me. The amount of psychological warfare she is capable of is actually impressive and terrifying.

I’ve cut her off several times in my adult life. I had no contact with her for 2 years, when our dad passed away. He had 5 kids and her and I were the only two remotely upset by his passing. She was the only one that somewhat helped me with his estate (I was appointed executor.) I have tried to maintain a relationship with since because of these things… and she was better. Then last year her estranged husband (been split since 2019) died in a tragic car accident. Oh boy, she took that for all she could. From playing the poor widow to the financial gain that came with that. I keep those opinions to myself because it doesn’t actually affect me besides it’s gross and annoying.

Fast forward to this year… it’s been absolutely skin crawling to be around her because I can’t remotely have a conversation with her without it being turned around. She hardly listens to a word I say no matter how important it is. I’ve tried telling her my feelings but then she guilt trips me, refuses to take responsibility and her famous line she has used for years??? “I know I’ve done wrong in the past but i can’t change that I can only change the future and I’m doing my best.”

So today, I’m leaving my appointment and she calls me. Asks what I’m doing, I’m already irritable. I tell her and she says I never told her what time I had my appointment. She asks if I can run an errand I agree.

I get to her house. She sitting on the porch, and she starting in… about how her life sucks, then she just spewing lies about random shit left and right and asks me about some handwriting on a card she receive from some dude in prison “it’s so pretty huh?! Isn’t his handwriting nice.” I tell her I didn’t notice. She states well you read the card didn’t you?? I was like yea but I didn’t pay attention to the dudes penmanship.

She says what’s wrong with you? You’re not in a nice mood. I tell her yea I’m super irritable and idk why. She doesn’t listen to me and repeats her question.

I was already super overstimulated, annoyed irritable and stressed. I throw my hands up and told her I need to fucking leave. To avoid confrontation. She guilt trips me and I leave any way. I text her bout 10 minutes later because I felt bad. “You didn’t do anything legit wrong I’m just irritable and needed to leave.” She responds…. I’m sorry I upset you, I didn’t mean to please don’t be mad at me. I can never do anything right and I always ruin everything.

I didn’t respond. She triggers me so bad because I don’t trust a word out of her mouth.

I want to bail on her again but then I’ll be entirely alone in my mourning of my father. :/ AITAH?