Made a throwaway to protect my identity. Back in May, my fiance of 3 years decided to up and leave. The reasons she gave me were that I wasn't helping enough around the house, wasn't spending enough time with her, wasn't taking enough care of our daughter. While I admit I could have done more, it wasn't as bad as she tried to make everyone believe.

For a little context, back in November, I stepped down from my supervisor position at work due to the immense stress. I was struggling mentally, and in my free time I did things that calmed me down such as watch TV and play my video games. I also played with my daughter. After I stepped down, work started retaliating against me by giving tasks they knew I didn't like, and that mentally stressed me out. As such I fell into a depression and stopped going to work for a while. This put a serious strain on our Financials, and we fell a bit behind, but nothing too drastic. I always made it work.

We argued a few times about our issues, and I tried doing better. I went back to work, picked up OT, started spending more time with my fiance, started doing more when it came to our daughter. Fast forward a couple of months and I noticed her acting differently. Acting like my presence annoyed her, not talking to me. Sometimes just straight up ignoring me when I asked what was wrong. This went on for a few months until the end of May. We had another arguement when I tried to do something nice for her. She said she needed to talk to me and it wouldn't be easy. I immediately left for work and we talked about those same issues. She felt like I hadn't improved and wanted to leave. I immediately told her I would take care of all the chores and make sure everything got done, all she had to do was relax. Two weeks later she tells me the night before that she's leaving.

She claims the last 7 months of our relationship she was unhappy. We only talked a few times about it, but she never mentioned that she was unhappy. Anytime I asked, she said she was fine, many times straight up ignoring me. In the weeks prior I started taking her out on dates more, trying to spend more time with her. Turns out that she was spending the last several months secretly planning to leave me. She was going to originally do it while I was at work and never tell me. She took stuff from the house to a storage locker. Her brother finally told her he wouldn't help unless she told me. I find out weeks later that she has been lying to me. I tried to make her happy, and she always said that she was.

Idk what to think of it all. The past few months I felt something was off, but she kept saying I was fine. It threw me off and I fell back into depression. She changed her phone password and lied about why. She said because people at work tried go get into it, but really she didn't want me to find the conversations of her planning to leave.

After she left she said we didn't need to go to court for our daughter. Admittedly, I didn't handle the break up well, especially after I found out she had been lying to me. I said some very nasty things to her, and I regret most of them. But she refused to talk about anything to do with our relationship, and I hand a lot of unanswered questions. I felt like our relationship could have been saved with better communication, but she didn't want to.

This week I found out she secretly filed for custody behind my back. Citing that I wasn't bathing her or combing her hair. Both false, but instead of trying to communicate her concerns, she just blindsided me with this. This whole ordeal has me wanting to die. I have extreme abandonment issues, and this does it for me. Her filing for custody broke the camels back. Idk how long I can take this. I get I wasn't the best partner while I was depressed, but am I totally in the wrong here?