Hi guys. I think the situation for me has hit a limit. I can not continue with my current sleep (or better said complete lack of it) schedule.

I wake up everyday at 9am. Because of my job

You would think that after a while my body would adapt. No, just not. If the direction of you advice goes this way, please spare me. I will wake up everyday at 9am, and not nap in the afternoon. Then, I will proceed to get sleepy at around 20-22 or so.

From here there are only two options:

1) I go to bed. No too early, but lets say around 22-23. Religiously, I will wake up at around 1-2am. Completely, completely awake.

2) I dont go to bed, and wait for closer to 1am. I will avoid phones, and computer screens. I will read, and I will not eat heavy. 1 am comes, and my stupid body will be like "PERFECT MOMENT TO HAVE A SURGE OF ENERGY"

Both scenarios, I am fucked.

Ok, so now I slept only say 4-6 hours, depending on the day. So, you say, I will be tired early, and I will sleep well.

No, refer back to 1) and 2). That will happen exactly the same.

After the third or fourth day of slowly degenerating my brain, my body will finally give up and allow my to get 8 hours of deep full sleep.

I can not explain the happiness that comes when I wake up after this regenerating sleep.

A minimal error will trigger the same pattern all over again.

What happens when I dont have to wake up at 8 or 9, and I am free to wake up at 10-11?

I can go to sleep at 3am

My body tells me that is indeed acceptable. In this case, I get more good nights of sleep, than bad nights. If I delay my sleep to 4am, I can get it back to 3am relatively effortless. Here, with this schedule, the typical sleep related advice starts to work. Here, it matters if I am on my phone or reading a book, if my room is comfie, etc etc. At 11pm? None of that advice works.

I dont know what to do anymore.

In my native country (south america) it is much easier for me to have a better schedule. I wake up even earlier (with the 6am sun or so), and at 10 I am exhausted, usually, though some days I push it 12. Again I am not sure what moves the needle here.

In actual country I wake up with the sun in my face. I wake up hungry and go have a breakfast. I follow most of the sleep related advice, though not perfectly.

Only thing I can say is that is possible I have sleep apnea, I am researching this right now. But even so, why the apnea would make my circadian rhythm delayed?

I take magnesium. Helps. Melatonin helps but the quality of my sleep will be absolutely destroyed if I take it. I have taken clonidine, worked AMAZINGLY in the beggining, I almost cried of happiness. Didnt sleep that well in YEARS. Ofc, it stopped working (never raised it more than 150mcg howver). Benadryl does nothing. Trazadone nothing. Benzos can work, but weakly so. Only one that works is bromazolan and that a nuclear bomb. I mean, ffs, I even tried HGH. (Some days would knock me out some others would give me a energy boost, yeah fuck me)

Sorry for the rant. I am just in awe how could I wake up at 01 am right now, after sleeping for 3 hours, even though I slept for 4 hours 2 days in a row. Why is my body not even tired. What the fuck

If this continues like this I will have to change my job. I cant continue burning my mind like this.

If anyone has any advice that I have not tried, I am absolutely open to it. Thanks