I am fairly new into a job. I joined as a contractor so I could start then go on a trip. This meant I would not have insurance till I came back. I was fine with this because I had some extra medication lying around and knew I wouldn't need it for my trip.

I came back mid December and for money reasons decided not to get on insurance till January. I thought I had enough medications to scrape through but what I didn't anticipate was that this new plan requires prior authorization for each medication involved in treating my ADHD.

Apparently this isn't so abnormal? But it's my first time dealing with it.

So now i'm stuck in this fax machine mess trying to sort out who is supposed to start the possibly up to 5 day process with it being unclear whether I will be notified when it completes.

Normally I don't request accommodations. I work in tech and for the most part when i'm medicated I don't think I am at any disadvantage. The only time I did it was because a micromanager manager was really causing problems.

This week hasn't been the best. Ive spent hours contacting all the parties involved to figure out what is going on with the authorization and how to solve it. Other hours I worried. I have been wildly unfocused. Ive done some great work still but i've got a collection of small bits of progress towards a collection of tasks rather than having a lot to show for this week. I also pulled some late nights where I was stressed I didn't do enough so I tried to do more at awful hours and just ended up in this cycle of sleep deprivation that probably didn't help.

Given I am trying to start on a good foot with this company I am unsure what to do. A few weeks in I already had a conversation with my manager where they were clear I was not quite up to par and needed to refocus on output. But this manager also self described themselves as (not in their words) wanting to constantly hold their employees feet to the fire a bit so they're uncomfortable and grow. I was kind of down to try that but it does mean I have no idea how serious that conversation was.

Anywho this week I would like to feasibly apologize and I would love to be able to explain to them what is going on. But who knows if that will be responded to with empathy. Im in a right to work state and frankly it's not at all difficult to find a reason to say you fired someone. They probably have a few good reasons that would hold up if anyone investigated.

I overall like it here and like my manager even though it may sound cutthroat. Im trying to grow and the opportunity here is incredible for that. So I guess if I did apologize for this week and let them in on what is going on I would want to:

• Explain that I agree that I am not happy with my output this week. 
• Show that I care about performing my job well. That I heard their feedback last week and am trying to refocus on the right things. 
• Make it clear that choosing shitty health insurance plans will impact workers ability to perform (in multiple senses) 
• It could be good early on to know my managers stance and experience on ADHD. It would be awful to leave but if this conversation goes south id rather know this is going to be an issue and start looking for my next gig now. 

But for obvious reasons this could backfire.... Do you think the pros outweigh the cons here? is there a good way to bring them into my situation without perhaps making myself sound weak