Hello everyone. I was diagnosed with ADHD around 6 months ago. It has helped me understand myself better, but there is one aspect that nothing has been able to solve, no amount of therapy or reason. When I'm waiting for somethig that isn't 100% dependent on me I literally go insane.

I'm in the middle of changing my PhD project - objectively everything looks like the change is going to go through. I have a supervisor who said is very happy to take me back (I used to be his MSc student). There was a slight delay and issues regarding some logistics/funding bits, but some people at the top gave me green light about it before Christmas. I emailed my new supervisor about it around the 18th and basically clarified that the issues that we were facing have been solved, now we just need to submit a proposal. He went on a Christmas break on the 16th and was supposed to be back today. He still hasn't replied - I know it's probably him getting through 100 emails after being away for so long, but waiting and knowing that the issue isn't fully solved is absolutely destroying me right now. I can't sleep, my mind is racing, I can't stop Doom scrolling, can't focus on work at all. All I do is imagine that he actually hates me now and is sick of me, and my mind comes up with 50 different emails he can send me saying "This was a mistake, I don't actually want to supervise you" or even worse - I become convinced that he hates me so much he won't reply at all. The feeling in my stomach it's absolutely awful. I can't enjoy my time off with my family, when I'm out with friends I just frantically check my email. Has anyone been through a similar situation? How do I stop this paralysis? I literally can't get off my phone because I check my emails (not exaggerating) every 30 seconds. Please help me