I've been working on a writing project for the past few years, and now that I'm (98%) finished with it I don't know what to do. I've spent a lot of time and energy not just working on this project in general as well as the work I've put in managing my mental health symptoms and utilizing my coping mechanisms. I've always had this thing my whole life where I never finish things... so this project was the one I finally wanted to sit down on and say okay, I'm going to force myself to do this, and it's going to suck at least some of the time but I'm going to push through it.

Now, a second factor here is I also have an extremely hard time living in the moment and enjoying the present. I always feel super high strung and like I need to finish whatever I'm doing currently so I can get onto the next best thing even though usually the thing I'm doing is actually the thing I'd enjoy the most right then. I don't know how to turn that off, that feeling like I always need to hurry up to finish whatever I'm doing so I can move on to the next thing. And then when I move onto that next thing the cycle starts all over again. It's a lose lose situation.

So I've been finalizing the project I've been working on and this morning I'm finally finished! Now the only thing left is to do one last review before I eventually decide to release it. But now I'm kind of like... Okay, I did what I wanted, I finished a complete project for the first time in my life, but now what? I thought that feeling of needing to move on to something better would go away if I were actually able to stick with something and finish it from start to end. I thought I'd finish this and feel accomplished since I succeeded in doing what I want I wouldn't have to feel like there was something better I had to move onto. Because I already just did the something better, and I finished it. But now that I am I feel the same way as before I started, just as if I have to move onto the next best thing again.