I feel all over the place at the moment. I’m trying to feel good about being into ABDL, but I keep fluctuating between feeling good and bad, every day is different.

I feel like having a partner into ABDL would make all the difference, it would give it some meaning, but I’m not sure to what extent I want it in my life. I go from feeling like it’s a great meditative healing thing to it’s gross and silly. From thinking loads of people do it, it’s harmless, cute to what a time sink that was, why am I doing this.

It feels at odds with the rest of my life. I like being pro-active and uh good hygiene is important, but ABDL for me is about lazing around and soiling myself!

I’m just not sure it’s sustainable, I don’t know how to find a middle ground between indulging in it and suppressing it.