This is a bit of a vent, if this isn’t the place for it I’ll delete my post, I apologize if this is a touchy subject or upsets anyone’s day. I’ve talked about it before and then deleted the post cause I feel guilty but it’s keeping me up at night and I’m just scared and alone.

The guilt just doesn’t go away, I like abdl and I want to be allowed to like it, but it just feels like if I do, or if I am into it bad things keep happening to me. I know I’m probably just manifesting it in my own head but the last few nights(this one included) I lay awake staring at the ceiling asking myself “should I stop?” I know it takes time to accept myself. However this anxiety is just crazy and I don’t know if it should be a sign or if I’m just being paranoid, I’m so lost and tired and I just wanna cry.